Community › Forums › Legal Advice India › How to protect my finances from my absentee father.
- This topic has 11 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 2 months ago by
Urbankashish9395.
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UUrbankashish9395
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 1:56 pmMy Father, left me, my mum and my sis and went off with another woman when I was 15.We had to rely on the combined handouts of my immediate relatives. They gave us what they could spare and tbh, I will be grateful to them till the day I die.
I studied as well as I could, got a job when I was 17, and took care of my education that way. Since I didnt have any contacts or any form of career guidance, I worked here and there, and was able to pay off whatever family debt by the age of 25. After that, we were beginning to live a little; Wearing clothes that weren’t hand-me-downs, buying furniture and so on. I am now 29.
A couple of months ago, my sister revealed to us that she was seeing someone. The guy’s family was more than we could have ever hoped for, and we got her married, using whatever funds we had on hand.
My sister, wanted our father at her wedding. We were all against it, but in the end, we caved. We got hold of him. He came, performed all the necessary rituals, didnt contribute a single rupee to the proceedings, and everything went well.
Its been 2 months since this happened. Now, my father keeps calling me everyday, asking for monetary support. I had initially thought about denying it. I have built years of resentment for him and I would sooner see my money burn rather than it being used by him.
Recently, he has threatened that he can take me to court for neglecting a parent. Now, If a judge hears my story, I doubt that they would side with him. However, I am not well versed in Law and I am assuming there is more to be known regarding this.
I want to know what I can do to protect myself, specifically my money, if he does choose to file a case against me.I neither have the funds (I only make enough to live) nor the time (I have a full time job) to go through court proceedings.
My father is a known compulsive gambler and *He smells of Elderberries* constantly. Part of the debt that I had to pay off was because of him.
Are there procedures to protect myself and my economic interests from being affected by him?.
My sincere apologies for the wording, if any area is not clear please feel free to ask me. I am not familiar with how to converse with legal minds. Any help is much appreciated. Thank you.
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KKhushistar405
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 2:17 pmNALDo you have proof of all this debt you’ve paid?
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UUrbankashish9395
OP
April 24, 2025 at 2:24 pmThe debts were in the form of pawned jewels. My mother may have the receipts for the recovery of these jewels. The payments were made via g-Pay from my account.-
KKhushistar405
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 2:28 pmIn all likelihood he’s bluffing and won’t come after you. Trying to guilt you into paying. If he doesn’t have money, he can’t hire a lawyer. In case he does, it may help to have the proof of all the payments you have made and of his absence for 14 years-
UUrbankashish9395
OP
April 24, 2025 at 2:32 pmThank you for the advice. Please explain what evidence I can gather to show he has been absent.
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CCoolnisha5299
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 2:31 pmHe just threatened you. I don’t think he will file a parenting maintenance claim(section 144 of BNSS) , but in case he does, you can argue that he never acted as a father throughout your life. So, the case may go in your favour.For an exact solution, I’ll need to find case laws that support your side, which will take some time. But for now, try to collect evidence of the amount you paid as a debt for your father. I hope you have witnesses who know what your father did when you were just a child. He used to drink and collect that evidence as well.
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DDesidiksha6649
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 2:32 pmNAL but I would suggest you get a lawyer. Find out the necessary course of action and how to protect yourself against your father. If he can complain of absenteeism and neglect then you have a lot to say about that considering he left you at 15. However, a gambler is a desperate man and desperate men do desperate things so it would be advisable to get the counsel of a lawyer.
Also, tell him not to call you again and block his number. -
DDesiknight9081
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 2:49 pmHi. I’m a Delhi based lawyer. If by any chance he does end up seeking maintenance, he will not hold a great chance at it because he deserted you, lived in adultery etc. So don’t worry about it. -
PPronimesh3885
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 3:19 pmGo to a vakil and ask the process of you and your mum disowning your father. Once you’ve disowned him, let him go to court and file a case against you. -
HHappyknight8519
PARTICIPANT
April 24, 2025 at 5:13 pmFirst thing, people like you are inspiration. You took what was an extremely tough situation at 15 years old like a man. You stood up for your family and supported them and even married off your sister.He is just threatening you for easy money. he does not have the guts or the effort it takes to file a court case and won’t stand a chance in court. Inform him that you probably actually have an opportunity to counter sue him as he left two minor kids without any support and with a lot of debt. You sister deserves a slap for bringing that loser back into your life. Hope you told her that he is blackmailing you.
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VVivekguru848
PARTICIPANT
April 25, 2025 at 3:33 amif he goes in court, you can prove his incompetence & deserting entire family. -
PPrimetejas7441
PARTICIPANT
April 25, 2025 at 9:16 amHe doesn’t have money but can go to court , wishing him good luck getting a lawyer even probono
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