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AHi everyone,
I’m a 22-year-old government employee currently working in Delhi. A few months ago, I was in a consensual relationship with a girl from Odisha who is above 18 years of age. We were emotionally and physically involved, and while we sometimes called each other “husband and wife” in chats, I had clearly told her multiple times that marriage wouldn’t be possible due to family reasons. She agreed and continued the relationship voluntarily.Eventually, we eloped — but here are the facts:
• She willingly left her home.
• Her cousin dropped her off.
• Her parents were aware and in contact on the day of the elopement.After the breakup, she (or her family) has either filed or threatened to file a rape case under BNSS Section 69 (equivalent of IPC 376 — rape on false promise of marriage). I’ve also been linked to CrPC Sections 161 and 164, and I’m extremely anxious about the next steps.
I haven’t received an official notice yet, but I know how serious this is — especially because:
• This is a non-bailable offense
• I’m a central government employee, and any such FIR could lead to suspension or termination
• I’m not hiding — I’m in Delhi and preparing to apply for anticipatory bailWhat I have:
• Screenshots showing I never promised marriage; in fact, I told her openly I couldn’t marry
• Messages showing her consent and active planning of our elopement
• Proof that she contacted me again after the breakup, through a throwaway Instagram account, behaving affectionately, denying any complaint, and showing no signs of distressI’ve kept all chat records, call screenshots, and details organized. I’m trying to file for anticipatory bail and protect my job.
If anyone here has:
• Faced a similar false case
• Knows a criminal lawyer in Odisha (preferably Balasore or Cuttack)
• Can connect me to men’s rights groups like SIFF, MWT, etc.
• Or has tips for handling this legally and professionallyPlease reach out. Even a small piece of advice or contact could mean a lot right now.
Thank you for reading. -
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M>Did I miss that part 😅 men and there audacity 🤡
What audacity? Women are not men’s responsibility for taking care of them. Take care of yourselves ladies -both financially and otherwise 💅.
I find it stupid and disgusting that women have the entitlement that they need to be taken care of or that any physical relationship entitles them to a marriage.
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PMy friend who’s in Indian Navy managed to get a similar situation sorted with help from his influential senior by underhanded tactics. Try this route. Oldies in such professions have contacts everywhere.
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Fis ur friend a grade 1 officer? he must hve maintained quite strong relations for senior to risk getting dragged in this mess
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MCriminal case
1. Seek transit anticipatory bail from district court in delhi.
2. Apply for anticipatory bail in district court in Orissa.
3. Be ready to urgently move to Orissa HC for anticipatory bail.
4. Keep all documents/chats etc handy, keep sufficient backups. Be ready to handover your phone as IO may seize all the phones.Service rules- Central Government service
1. Upon knowledge of registration of criminal case. Inform the competent authority about the case. This would prevent any future departmental inquiry for not informing about criminal case.
2. Suspension due to registration of FIR is neither automatic nor mandatory
3. Deemed suspension doesnt happen unless the arrest/custody period is more than 48 hours.
4. If there is arrest/custody, inform department immediately upon release
5. Parallel criminal case and Departmental enquiry should not happen in case of non official acts. However depending on the department concerned charge sheet under CCS rules for violation of rule 3(1) CCS Conduct rules can be made out. Court judgments state that DE should be deferred till conclusion of criminal trial if the case/witness/allegation is common as disclosure of defence in DE would prejudice criminal trial.
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MAnticipatory bail gives relief from immediate arrest.
BUT it also implies that you were anticipating such case may occur which means directly or indirectly you were involved in such an act and you knew problem will arise in future hence anticipatory bail.
It’s not the solution always!
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MWith the nature of allegations, as a lawyer I recommend seeking anticipatory bail.
Remember, if the IO exercises power to arrest, he cannot grant bail and the accused will end up spending a long time in jail.
Also seeking anticipatory bail implies nothing except apprehension of arrest(justified or unjustified). Whatever the Police implies from the anticipatory bail application is irrelevant anyways.
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SPeople having no knowledge of law and comment with such confidence.
Anticipatory bail is to protect you from arrest. The case can be maliciously filed too. Granting of anticipatory bail doesn’t mean one has committed the offence
If you don’t know.law then you should not speak up on social platforms
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SSupreme Court advocate here:
You don’t need to be too worried. Keep your chats and all related evidence handy.
Talk to the woman in question and tell her that you intend to pursue this legally. File for anticipatory bail as soon as you can. And as soon as she files an FIR, move to the HC to quash it.
Any FIRs alone can’t lead to you getting terminated. There is a whole different procedure for that.
There are many different aspects to any such case. As long as you keep yourself protected legally, you don’t need to worry.
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**Disclaimer: The information provided above does not, and is not intended to, constitute legal advice; instead, all information, content, and materials available are strictly for general informational purposes only and create no liability on the provider of said information. Readers should contact their attorney to obtain advice with respect to any particular legal matter.**
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ROP has been posting multiple places. He claims he is 24 and then 22.
Just putting here for context. Do see comments there
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskIndia/s/64Fa8XleRJ-
ENot just that 6 months ago he made a comment saying:
Same h bhai Har jagah, 23 M, 8 months ago, I joined at pay level 7, so parents insist now that it’s time to get settled. So, now I’m going to be married in few months.
Basically the mindset, is that once you’ ve fared fairly in the job phase, it’s time to go on to the next phase i.e. the family phase wherein you have to have wife and kids and focus on kids and then the cycle goes on
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LYour first step should be to secure an anticipatory bail, higher a good lawyer. Keep your chats handy, nowadays so many courts and SC have reiterated that consensual sex is not rape after relationship goes sour.
If police harrasses, advise would be to meet them through 3rd party and grease the OC a bit to avoid arrest. Don’t get politicians involved because they will only try to milk you for more money.
Tell the girl to fuck off and suck her ass and also that you would proceed legally.
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PApply for anticipatory bail. A good lawyer will tell you the strategy on what to speak. Don’t tell anything to Police . Just avoid the questions or tell them I will talk with my lawyer.
The day I joined at my posting location. Seniors in my office told me to stay away from local girls. -
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CSame thing happened to a friend of mine he was committed for 2 years planned to get married then they had a big fite( girl cheated) they broke up and she filed case.. A very good lawyer 1st got Anticipatory bail little money to police( lol) and then he printed out thr fite on Insta and watsapp 40 pages or so Calcutta high court quashed this observing tht the guy wanted to marry and is not acting on bad faith… they did get into a big fite and tht such fite is reasonable cause to call off wedding…. So get a good lawyer to wat he says u vll not be arrested unless the girl is big shot( true story )
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CPlease don’t apply for anticipatory bail, in case the case is filed, send your lawyer or family friend to first find out if the cops want to arrest you? If you apply for anticipatory bail and it is denied, then the cops will be forced to arrest you. This is what I have understood from a YouTube channel of a Supreme Court lawyer
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SHere are the steps OP:
Of course the point being that you think elopement just means to run away from gharwaale. Anyway:
1. Move your anticipatory bail application. Do NOT inform her of what steps you are taking. Do NOT go and disclose your plans to her family. Keep this under wraps. Unlike what has been suggested to you by someone else.
2. File a complaint for filing a false case against you. Also file a case for defamation against them. A very strongly worded legal notice to scare the shit out of them and ask for hefty fees in damages. This is after you have been granted a bail.
3. Keep all your chats, screenshots, call recordings safe. It’s another matter entirely to record without the other party’s consent. Create a backup copy as well.
4. As a government employee you can be terminated from your job if you are found guilty of rape and convicted. Unless you have a moral turpitude clause which would be enough for them to make a case against you for disciplinary action and termination.
5. Clearly you both are a bunch of horny teenagers who have no idea what you’re doing in life. But considering the age difference you are probably leading the little 18 year old into believing that one day you will have a change of heart and marry her. Especially because you both lovingly call each other husband and wife. You are leading her on. Both parties need to be on the same page if they are involved in a sexual relationship and love each other and yet don’t want to get married. Your girlfriend is NOT on the same page.
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AThere are two conditions laid down in Pramod Surya pawar Vs State of Maharashtra
The promise of marriage must have been givn a in Bad faith with No intentions of being adhered to at the time it was given
And second false promises must be immediate relevance or direct nexus to women’s decision for engagement in sexual act .
Now check for your self whether before or around your “eventual Elopement” did you play hushband &wife on WhatsApp and you need to show that right from the beginning stage of relationship itself you had no Serious intention to marry the compaliantFrom My understanding go for Quashing of FIR rather Than anticipatory bail and u may demand in alternative in Quashing of petition that ACCUSED may be granted A.bail if HC do not quash the said FIR and if HC do not quash you can challenge it in SC cause u r in kind of LUCK casue SC recently expressed its concern over misuse of Rape Sections after break up of consensual relationship .
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EThoda confusing hai….
Called each other husband and wife (in jest?)
Eloped (to not get married?)
Got in touch with her parents on day of elopement (to tell them don’t worry we’re just running away not getting married?)
Story doesn’t add up even in Reddit post. I’m unsure how it’ll hold in court…
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AFacts are stranger than fiction.
1) We were emotionally invested and hence the husband and wife
2) We eloped to stay together not marry and she agreed to it and even helped me to plan it
3) We both lied to her parents about the marriage and she was the one who told me to lie about it
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EYour case no grounds.
You both called each other husband and wife in chats. Does your screenshots show that too? Anyways i am sure her screenshots will surely show that.Even if the judge lets that slide, what was your thinking when she eloped with you. Did you think that “since i have already told her i cannot marry, so it wont be a problem to elope and have sex then i will drop her home”?
You gave her more signs of “i am ready to marry” than signs of “ i can surely never marry”
I may believe that she tricked you into chatting and calling her wife so that she can file a case on you. But the eloping part is where you are guilty.
Best advice according to ke would be go for settlement of the case.
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MBro, you screwed up. You need a very good lawyer to file for cancellation of FIR at the high court. If this case goes for trial, it will take a long time and you are cooked.
You need professional legal advice to understand what consequences a trail will have on your job, and if you can get into some kind of settlement with the girl’s family so they may withdraw the case.
Please inform your family. This issue is too big for you to handle alone. And lawyer up fast!
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LI’m really sorry you’re going through such a stressful and scary situation. It’s heartbreaking how complex relationships can spiral into serious legal trouble, especially when emotions are involved. You’re doing the right thing by staying organized, collecting proof, and seeking legal help early. I hope you’re able to find the right support and get through this with truth and clarity on your side.
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BWe “sometimes called husband and wife”
“ emotionally and physically involved”
“We eloped”Brother you have been put on APT charges
If the charges were kidnapping or something else then it was at fault
Or do you not know what Elopement means
And btw if you didnt have “marriage” on cards with her
Ghar se kyu bhaga rhe the uske? For Live in ? And then you go separate ways and you get married to choice of your parents and uska wo dekhe? Matlab kya soch rhe the tum?? -
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KPlease note that the following is not legal advise:
For an offence under Section 69 of the BNS Act to occur the following two ingredients are required:
1. The promise of marriage must be “false” from the outset.
2. The false promise must be directly linked to the victim’s decision to engage in the sexual act.
To counter such an allegation, it is crucial to demonstrate that the relationship was based on good faith and evolved over time based on mutual consent, emotional connection, and continued association, rather than arising solely from a singular promise of marriage. This helps challenge the assertion that the alleged promise was the immediate or exclusive cause of the relationship.
The Hon’ble Supreme Court’s decision in Prashant Bharti vs. State of NCT of Delhi is particularly relevant here. The Court observed that it is inconceivable, that the complainant or any woman would continue to meet the Appellant or maintain a prolonged association or physical relationship with him in the absence of voluntary consent on her part.
In support of this, digital records such as WhatsApp messages, emails, call logs, or social media interactions can serve as crucial evidence. These can help establish whether the relationship was manipulative or whether it was a genuine, evolving bond between two consenting individuals.
The only potentially complex aspect in your matter appears to be the issue of elopement. However, if there was ongoing communication and association between the two of you after the elopement, it can further reinforce the argument that the decision was not driven solely by a fraudulent inducement. Rather, it was a deliberate and informed choice made by both individuals.
To strengthen this position, it is important that you provide a plausible, genuine reason for why the marriage ultimately did not materialize. Factors such as family opposition, financial instability, personal aspirations, or evolving circumstances can help demonstrate that the breakdown of the relationship was due to subsequent developments—not because of any deceitful intent from the beginning.
Any documentary evidence—such as communications that reference the elopement, discussions about marriage, or conversations reflecting on the nature of the relationship—can be pivotal. These materials can show that both parties weighed the consequences and realities of their decisions, lending weight to the argument that the elopement was an informed decision rather than a blind leap based on a false promise.
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KIn addition to this, if you’ve clearly and explicitly communicated that marriage might not be possible because of family-related issues, and she still chose to continue the relationship with you, that can be a key point in your favor. It shows you were honest about your intentions from the start, and that there was no attempt to mislead or manipulate her into a relationship under false promises. That kind of transparency goes a long way in showing there was no deliberate deception.
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LInstead of waiting for MRAs to contact you. Go and contact MRAs.
SIFF has its own website where links to its groups are provided. You can even join SIFF groups from bio of @RealSIFF Twitter ID. You may call the helpline number too.
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