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UThree months ago, we finalized a marriage proposal for my sister, and her engagement was scheduled to take place soon. The groom seemed like a good match, and everything was going smoothly. We had already made all the necessary arrangements.
However, out of the blue, a girl called my sister and claimed that the groom had been in a relationship with her for the past year, including a physical relationship. She also mentioned that their relationship continued until just a week ago. When she confronted him about the situation, he allegedly told her to focus on making good memories before ending things.
She sent recordings of recent talks and which also included my sister voice when they are talking and all , they were physical in last week as per her.
But she’s not ready to come infront of everyone and she’s behaviour is not steadyGiven this, what steps should we take from our side?
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U> However, out of the blue, a girl called my sister and claimed that the groom had been in a relationship with her for the past year, including a physical relationship
What was the motive of the girl? If the marriage was finalized three months ago, then why was she still in relationship with this guy? She seems shady as fuck.
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UHe seemed nice and innocent, that’s why he got trapped by her but fine line is bw stupidity and innocence , he behaved stupid by maintained her even after confirmation
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BOk, I’m gonna play the devil’s advocate here. First case, it’s just a word of mouth from a girl. And the recording is from an event and not when they were private. Their relationship is just 1 year old. Your sister is having an arranged marriage, he’s not under any obligation to be exclusive to Your sister. The marriage is only finalised, the engagement is yet to happen. He broke up with her promptly before that, with no intention to continue the relationship with her. It’s obvious the other girl is pissed and maybe jealous. This would be more serious if he wanted to continue the relationship while being married to your sister.
So, if you think this is wrong, are you insinuating that your partner shouldn’t have had any relationships in the past? If you say once the marriage is finalised they should be exclusive, would that mean they could live as husband and wife right after finalising? If you say engagement or marriage I’d the line, why does the line work different for different aspects? In the end, it’s an arranged marriage.
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URishtha was finalized 3 months back and dates for engagement and shadi was fixed on that date , he said that he was going to marry other girl to that girl last week
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BIt finally comes to you and how you view it. You still didnt answer my question at all. At what point do you consider your sister married to him? And how is it cheating? And how sure are you that he didnt tell her about it earlier and it was she who was dragging it till last week and got pissed when he broke it off altogether? The recording was from they were together at an even, and if he hadnt told her about his wedding, what was her intention to record it? He knew that girl for 1 year and he met your sister 3 months back. Would you expect him to drop a girl who he knows well for a girl he just met? What if he had second thoughts about your sister and took a well-informed decision after getting to know her for 3 months?
There are people who make themselves completely free before looking for marriage and there are people who are in temporary relationships before they find someone tangible. If your sister thinks she deserves someone of the first kind, its fair. Just drop it off and find a new person. Or if she found other red flags with him when she talked to him all these months. Second option is for her to confront him and take a well-informed decision after hearing his side. In any case, the only person who’s getting out of this unscathed is the girl who called your sister. You will have to explain all your relatives about why you are cancelling the wedding and so does the groom.
So, my final 2 cents are, you can just avoid all the drama by calling off the wedding. YOu might end up saving your sister from a possible cheater or tarnishing the credibility of a normal person, but you will never know. Or you can find the truth about what happened and if your sister had no other issues with the guys so far, she will be missing out on a possible good guy because some girl wanted some drama. Imagine him calling of the wedding because some guy called the groom and told him that your sister is involved with him and the groom didnt even decide to hear your sisters side of the story and the reason for cancellation will be what that guy told him. Its up to you.
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NHey OP it’s kind of messy situation.
Better to walk out of it, cancel the wedding. A girl cancelling the wedding has no legal implications.
But the problem is that your sister has become intimate with the guy.
And if this is her first time being intimate with a man then it will scar her pretty bad. She would have already fallen for him else she would not have become intimate with him.
Talk to her separately. I think it’s not our job to tell her what to do. See what she wants to do as well. Then let her take a call and support her the best way you can.
Don’t take things the legal way as it’s not required here and it may bring bad light on your sister which may impact her future marriage prospects.
Better deal with this situation as cautiously as possible. -
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UThings will remain this way for generations and things like this will continue to happen until people get out of the mind that, apne khaandaan me he rishta Krna hai. China is making a competitor in technology to US while here we are concerned that rishta apne biraadari waali ldki me ho ya ldka sarkaari naukri wala ho.
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DDon’t rush the decision, the girl might be a crazy stalker EX, who would do anything to mess up the grooms life or any marriages he would do. A good worthy life would be missed by your sister. Think about your sister feelings too. Don’t just believe anything a stranger says. Ask the groom about same.
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UI found out my boyfriend (not sure what else to call him now) got married to another woman he had been dating for a year longer than he had been dating me. I found out one week after the marriage. Worse, I didn’t have proof. All the chats were deleted because my parents were visiting me so I had cleared up my phone (all hail snoopy indian parents!) and i never used to click any pictures of us because i didn’t have a habit of clicking pictures. i reached out to the woman he married, his friends, his family. his family straight up blocked me and told him (i know this because he called me every time in anger when his family called). i am not sure if they believed me. the woman, i gave her as much proof as i could, she also blocked me after a couple of days. of those who believed me were only his friends but there wasn’t much to be done.
it’s not easy to be standing against the one you love. it’s even more difficult when the world doesn’t even believe you. i was asked degrading questions, his sister even went so far to call me a fool to have believed her brother. i have been disrespected in every way a woman possibly could be for no fault of mine, so i understand her hesitance. there is no kindness for the other woman. all the elders accused me of “trying to break the marriage”. I was asked, now he’s married so why are you doing this? only because i was at home waiting for him to return so that i could show him the estimates of our marriage.
i have been left so lonely that the only person i can talk to is actually the perpetrator himself. i feel like i fall apart every now and then and it feels like the day i found out and i go berserk all over again.
be grateful you found out before. be kind to the woman because you have no idea how much courage it takes to speak the truth and to live the aftermath.
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LBreak the marriage. Trust me, forget about log kya kahenge sochenge etc, that’s all a big turd of a nonsense. Society will not help your sister if she gets trapped in a failed marriage with this disastrous person. Break the marriage, confront the groom’s family about this matter, and cut them off for good.
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UWhatever is the truth, do not proceed with the marriage there are obvious red flags. U can take criminal action against the groom as having physical relationship with the promise of marriage and then deceiving the would be bride can be treated as rape with consent under false promises. The groom will be royally screwed but u need to come up with proper evidence before going on that route. Hire a lawyer and seek legal remedies which will teach this fraud groom a lesson for life.
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UUpdate: Guys family are saying that relation ended long back but she blackmailed with suicide so to make sure her safe he was in normal contact with her but she trapped him and made sure he confessed everything in recording and they also saying she did same thing with other people in earlier also like dat.
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UUpdate: The guy’s family claims that the relationship ended a long time ago, but she threatened suicide, so he maintained normal contact to ensure her safety. However, they say she manipulated him into confessing on a recording. They also allege that she has done similar things to others in the past.
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UCancel the wedding! The man will easily cheat on your sister with any girl, because if he had a girlfriend and he was getting marriage fixed, he could’ve told his parents to marry him to his girlfriend but he did not do that and instead accepted marriage with your sister while dating that girl, he will cheat on your sister too.
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