Community › Forums › Legal Advice India › How to prepare for a divorce?
- This topic has 33 replies, 22 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 4 months ago by
User_4c4c5ce2.
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AAnikafalcon485
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 4:39 pmMy colleague 35M got married 10months back(arranged marriage setup). Things were not working for him since early days of marriage. The girl is very aggressive, has a bad nature (doesn’t like her MIL although before the wedding the boy had made it clear with the girl and her family that his mother will be staying with them and the girl agreed. MIL is a pensioner and does things on her own), doesn’t take responsibility, she has hidden about her financial liabilities and dark past (3-6 months before this marriage she had a breakup from her ex whom she was dating and sort of living in relationships setup for 1-2yrs). The husband has tried reconciling 3-5 times but the girl and her family plays blame game. Moreover the girl has gaslighting nature, immature, lies all the time and has narcissistic traits. The girl has gone to her parent’s house and neither the girl nor her parents are talking to the husband. The husband has made many attempts to contact her and her family via calls and messages but no response. Now just incase things don’t go good and the girl side will not agree for a mutual divorce and would like to contest what are the things the husband needs to keep ready?? Can the husband somehow escape Maintenance and Alimony?? The girl is educated and has worked for 2-4yrs but currently unemployed. -
UUser_8361182f
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 4:43 pmI’m not a lawyer. but you do see how your colleague could be hiding a few things right? if it isn’t your circus don’t take sides early on. you will only regret once you know what conspired. plus the whole mom thing. – come on , you and i both know how our own mothers are treated. don’t take sides.-
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 4:51 pmSee he is not just my colleague he is childhood friend and i know him and his family very well. As far as i know my friend has some health issues that he had disclosed with the girl long before the wedding. And about this mother I know that she’s genuinely a kind person..she has supported her family when her husband was bedridden for 2-4 years..she worked hard to give her children education and other comforts. Whatever her children are is all because of her sacrifice. Now it’s the children’s responsibility to take care of her.-
UUser_4c4c5ce2
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:19 pmDont listen to her. Most women on reddit will support other women blindly. Some were also blaming Atul Subhash
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SSilentseeker4914
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 4:45 pmi would suggest to send a notice for mediation. call them to discuss things and try to sort things amicably first.-
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 5:09 pmOkay-
IIndiangargi2466
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:26 pmYeah maybe prefer it to be done at a mediation center, since they are professionals and will try to get both sides to see the upsides of a quick, mutual divorce than wasting life in complicated and unending legal battle.
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UUser_a815021a
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 4:52 pmBlud just say its you already reddit is anonymous. Why lie that it’s your colleague-
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 4:57 pmActually not..i did ask him to do it but he is in deep emotional distress so I’m helping him. I have posted just the some highlights. -
UUser_2062b41c
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 7:38 pmIt might be him or his colleague or his son, as a community are we gonna help each other or be a smarty pants?
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UUser_7c7c3e67
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:14 pmPossible, get a mutual consent divorce ..-
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 5:47 pmOkay…my friend is not sure if the girl will agree for it -
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 6:28 pmCan they ask for some settlement amount if it’s mutual? Or can they claim maintenance n alimony if its mutual?-
MMegaamar9740
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 11:00 pmIn mutual settlement amount and maintenance and alimony has to be agreed on from both the parties. Even if one party disagrees, this turns into contested.As this is arrange marriage set up, if the wedding was solely taken care of by girls family then it makes sense to pay for a settlement amount and get over with mutual. Avoid contested as much as possible.
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IIndiangargi2466
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:23 pmNot a lawyer.From what I have seen in online videos by lawyers, a common next step will be that she files random cases on you and your fam. Then she will try to force her entry into the house, may bribe police and women supporting organizations to create a scene and help her do it.
If she is able to do that then she can claim residence in the house via court orders and even get you and your family out citing domestic violence.
She can file cases like domestic violence, dowry harassment, cruelty (go for quashing if the fir has no specific incidents, like where and when it happened, just vague allegations, framing relatives who don’t even live with you all)
Contact a lawyer to discuss how the marriage took place, who paid for what, what gifts were given, jewelry etc. Whether you have anything like chats, call recording or something else to help you and stuff like that.
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AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 5:28 pmOkay thanks…i will talk to my friend about it.-
IIndiangargi2466
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:29 pmPlease read it again, i made certain edits
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EEpicgeeta9553
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:39 pmNALIf your friend comes under Hindu law, then he is royally screwed. Remember Atul Shubash? The poor guy is dead, and even after the entire nation came out in support, the wife and in laws are free!
Depending on the severity of the situation: if religion is not an issue, simply convert to Islam. While DV, dowry cases will be expected even then, you can always pay someone for a MUTA second marriage while the girl comes to a favorable negotiation position. Do not divorce her, let her ask for it. You can always do Ghar wapsi if you so desire.
This is one of the innovative ways to get around the situation.
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AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 5:42 pmHe is a Hindu. Well I’m not sure if he is willing to convert to Islam. -
AAkhillion58
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 7:10 pmKya religion le aaye legal advise mein!!!! -
KKhushistar405
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 7:30 pmWhat a shi**y piece of advice -
UUser_3298927d
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 8:13 pm🤣🤣 that’s one way to solve the issue
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UUser_c0ab26b5
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 5:45 pmNAL Something similar happening to me also. Currently going through the process.
Some tips:
Get a good trustworthy lawyer
File section 9
And DV petition from your house female sides
Be prepared for 498a Dowry and domestic case(Gather all the evidence to prove these false ).-
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 25, 2025 at 5:49 pmWhat is section 9And DV petition? My friend has some proof about his wife’s fraudulent behaviour and poor financial condition..will that help with something??-
UUser_8b9dfe02
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 6:42 pmNAL. but logically thinking, proving tht wife is not financially good might lead to husband paying the alimony in my opinion. So better to talk to lawyer and thn only give those proofs.
Bcz i guess to escape alimony, u need to prove tht wife is self sufficient.
Btw, such small duration of marriage is a plus point to avoid alimony. Just documnt tht she isn’t willing to come back.
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MMightybear961
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 7:02 pmBeware of Residential orders if your friend has his own house I suggest you sell it doesn’t matter in the name of his mother or his just sell and shift to rental property.Then file cases it will help to save you the biggest investment i.e. house.
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UUser_79eece8d
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 7:29 pmNAL. For whatever reason , it is best to assume the bride has malicious intent and go forward with any divorce proceedings.Keep in mind , all the divorce / separation related knowledge I have is from the internet and the subreddit here. So take my advice with a bit of salt.
1) Have detailed call records of the bride and the family your friend is trying to contact. Screenshots of the calls / messages should be with the phone number , not the contact name.
2) I know of a case firsthand where a woman went to the police station to ask for mediation. This is sort of a precursor to a police complaint where the police intervene and see if both sides can mend ways. In this case I am not sure how much water holds for a mans side of the argument but it would be best for him to do something similar and have a record of it , in the brides local police station.
3) When going to the police station / brides house , it would be best to take a lawyer with you. Even better would be if you could find a lady lawyer since they will know the ins and outs better.
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QQuicklion73
PARTICIPANT
February 25, 2025 at 10:54 pmHire a kickass lawyer.Negotiate outside the court and ensure it leads to mutual consent.
Keep all communication timelines handy, call records, messages, if there’s proof of her past relationship in writing, nothing better.
There’s many grounds for divorce, however the court proceedings will stretch and waste 2-3 years of your life and a lot of money.
Instead try and negotiate outside, pay some money to get rid of her if that’s what it takes, it’ll save you some peace of mind.
Discuss with your lawyer and ensure she doesn’t press criminal charges.
Good luck.
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AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 26, 2025 at 2:50 amAlright thanks for the advice.
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UUser_c5496958
PARTICIPANT
February 26, 2025 at 12:18 amSounds like my ex. -
UUser_2bf48541
PARTICIPANT
February 26, 2025 at 7:05 amHire a lawyer. As per the knowledge provided by you she will get some maintenance and alimony as well.
Only good thing about in this case is that your friend got to know about her early. It’s not too late. Also since girl is denying to come over to husband house. This will benefit in your favour and might get early divorce.-
AAnikafalcon485
OP
February 26, 2025 at 7:16 amOkay let me discuss this with my friend. Thanks
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PProrider4116
PARTICIPANT
February 26, 2025 at 7:22 amThey can file for divorce after completion of 1 year of marriage. He can file a contested divorce based on cruelty owing to her aggressive and fighting behavior. He has to collect some evidence through messages or photographs or videos of such behavior. Read through this to understand the procedure and grounds for contested divorce [https://divorcebylaw.com/best-contested-divorce-lawyers-in-bangalore](https://divorcebylaw.com/best-contested-divorce-lawyers-in-bangalore)when it comes to maintenance and alimony – it is decided based on many factors. If the wife has not lived with him for a long period, she’s capable of getting employed, wedding expenses were shared between the parties equally, and such other factors can be considered not to pay alimony or maintenance. To understand this further read here [https://divorcebylaw.com/maintenance/](https://divorcebylaw.com/maintenance/)
To make it faster and easier, mutual consent divorce is the option if the wife is agreeing to do so. all the terms and conditions of divorce including payment or non payment of alimony/ maintenance, division of assets and liabilities, etc. will be decided by the parties. Your friend can have a discussion with his wife (not the whole family) and decide on these. The process is as per this [https://divorcebylaw.com/mutual-divorce-lawyer-in-bengaluru/](https://divorcebylaw.com/mutual-divorce-lawyer-in-bengaluru/)
for further clarification contact us [https://g.co/kgs/QSAUDut](https://g.co/kgs/QSAUDut)
**Disclaimer:** In the absence of all the facts of the case, the comments given may not be the best solution for your case. One on one consultation with a legal counsel/ advocate is advised to get better guidance.
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AAmayaknight117
PARTICIPANT
February 26, 2025 at 9:59 pmGet in touch with SIFF before doing anything
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