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CHi everyone,
I really need some advice and maybe a little emotional support too.I’m a 23-year-old boy living in India.
For the past 4 years, I’ve been forced to work in my father’s furniture business.
I work from morning till night, managing both the shop and the showroom, but my parents have never paid me a single rupee.
Whenever I ask for money, they tell me, “We’re doing this for your future.”
But the truth is — they control me, they isolate me, and they treat me more like a worker than a son.I wake up at 4:30 AM every day to work on my YouTube channel, trying to build something for myself before heading to my father’s business at 10 AM.
I work until 9 PM and then repeat the same cycle.
I have no friends, no financial independence, and no real emotional support.
I’m stuck, and it’s starting to break me inside.I have dreams.
I want to live my own life.But the truth is — I’m broke.
And no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to escape this cycle.Has anyone here been in a similar situation?
How did you break free?
Any advice, motivation, or ideas would mean the world to me.Thank you for reading if you made it this far.
Really, thank you. -
VI don’t get it. You are managing the furniture business so the finances would under your control. Take your salary yourself from the company books every month. If asked, just say if they want you to work you need the pay. No one works for free.
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CMy father says, “Sab kuch tumhara hi hoga jab hum mar jayenge.”
But right now, I just work like a labourer — from 9 AM to 6 PM making dining tables, sofas, mandirs, etc. Then from 7 PM to 9 PM, I work again in the showroom doing deliveries and managing small tasks.My father still controls everything — manufacturing, showroom, payments — while I have zero control. The showroom workers are around 40-50 years old, and they feel uncomfortable taking instructions from me because of my young age — their ego doesn’t allow them to listen.
Honestly, my life feels stuck and hopeless right now.
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COP, I don’t know how you’ll take it but you’re in a good place in life but with very toxic people. your parents are very toxic. this is what money can do, they forget to love their own child. That said, you should go pursue MBA, I’m sure your parents will again say that who will work here etc etc but if you play your cards right, there is a slight chance that you can convince them. Something on the lines of “ye MBA bhi iss business ka future ke liye hi he”
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QanAndd they will use it for leverage whenever you guys have any sort of a difference. The first words you’ll hear would be “Kal see dikhna mat dukaan pe”. So many marriages go to hell cuz the man works for their parents and they control him like a horse just because they own the whole business. Be blunt and ask for you share (50% should be the min) saying that you can’t just spend your whole life under this uncertainty.
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SPlain and simple tell them on their face-
Dear parents, listen. I will not be your unpaid labour anymore. I can run this business only if I get paid well and on time.
I don’t care if this will be mine in future. I want my life and I want earning.
If you don’t agree and try to control me, I will leave this business instantly and go for a job.
If you push me further, I will leave this house too.
It might work. Stand up for yourself before it is too late and if it doesn’t leave the house.
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CI did try to ask for salary, but he said, Go wherever you want, but once you leave, don’t come back.
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PWell see, that’s on you now.
Either give up your independence, work for your father and wait for his death to inherit his business OR grab your independence and flee away from your home and make your future bright with no possibility of inheritance.
In present, you will suffer hard time in both cases. In future, you’ll be independent and successful, more and early in case you flee away, less and late if you wait for their death.
Your present is any way doomed, depends on you how want it to turn out. I would personally flee away, coz their death will anyway be around at 60-70 years of age in normal circumstances.
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DDon’t you have brothers or sisters? They may help you! Try to play smart, take money by whatever means, save it, build your own career. Btw what is your channel about? Can u share link?
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CHaving a family business might look lucky from outside, but it’s my father’s dream, not mine. I’m just being forced to fulfill his dreams.
He keeps comparing me to my relatives — like their sons who are 30-35, married, settled — but I don’t want that life.
Born, school, college, business, marriage, children, death — that’s not living for me. It’s just surviving.
I want to build something of my own, something that actually makes me feel alive.
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CIntroduce few products on your own and control the whole supply chain .. let your father know that profits are yours as salary
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CI actually tried introducing products on my own.
But I still needed help from workers like painters and wood carving people, and I had to manage paying them too.
Even after all that, when the products were sold, my father kept all the profits — didn’t share a single penny with me.
That’s the real problem here.
But thanks for suggesting me
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CThat’s good 😊
When I said whole supply chain , it means retailers / distributors/ customer .. sell them on ur own terms to them ..
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CI’ve been considering content creation, trading, and starting my own real estate business. Since you seem experienced, have you seen anyone deal with similar doubts? Are these actually viable options, or just hyped-up trends?”
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RYour parents behavior is Weird. Hence before the salary issue just ensure that the Continuity of the business is passed on to you. Check what kind of entity is it sole or partnership. Have a look at the GST and IT return being filed. Watch out for the bank account operations. Ensure there’s no outsider or close relatives connected with the business. Start digging slowly. Hopefully you don’t come across any skeletons that could jeopardise your future stake in the business. Start to explore new related ideas to the existing business.
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CUnless you are financially independent, you are stuck.
You will have to completely follow your parents’ orders despite being 23. This will continue after marriage also. Both you and your wife will have to live as per your parents’ instructions.
The only way out is to get a job. But that isn’t easy unless you are from a top college or have good technical skills. Most jobs are low-paying.
So try to work on side business like that youtube or something else and get money on your own.
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SFirstly, go and ask what is your father’s plan when is he going to let you take over everything? Secondly, share your business idea with him, and ask his feedback, if he agrees it’s a win-win. If he doesn’t agree ask why (eg: he says its a low profit product), go and check if that’s true and so on.
Does he give you money for your expenses and other stuff?
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TYou’re 23 and not a child. Tell them straight, either you need money as salary, or you can’t do this anymore. This is why family businesses are tricky, because parents expect you to work for free and for you to show gratitude to them for setting up a business for you. Don’t fall into this trap, first use your own head. Ask yourself these questions:
Is this business viable? Will it be viable in the upcoming years and give me the lifestyle I want? (you have access to the books, do the calculations yourself)
Do I see myself running this business in the next 10 years and continuing my father’s legacy? (highly depends on your relationship with him)
Is there something else I’d rather do than this, that can generate enough money for me to survive alone and has good career growth? (and no, if your youtube channel does not generate at least break even revenue yet, this cannot be your answer)
You’re an adult, take decisions for yourself. If they hold you hostage, resort to extreme situations, and try to leave the household ASAP.
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NBe patient. Parents die sooner than later. Then indeed, all is yours. The last thing you need is to be kicked out of something that you have also built so hard.
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CHonestly, I don’t feel good thinking about waiting for my parents’ death. It doesn’t sit right with me
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CI’m not trying to overreact. I’m genuinely concerned about my future. I do have a fear of death, and as time passes, I feel it approaching closer. I just want to live fully and do the things I dream of before it’s too late. Right now, I’m feeling a lot of confusion, and that’s why I asked this question — to find some clarity
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CI’ve been in your situation. Joined family business just after college. From 21 to now 27 and also got married 3months back!
I was very frustrated like you too due to not getting any salary or so but took the advice from reddit and realised I’m actually very lucky to have a family business.
Let me give you few points.
– I have a car (bought by father and he handles petrol expenses which is around 10k per month)
– I can take leave anytime I want due to him having a little more control over business than me.
– Spent on my wedding (Approx 70-80lakhs)
– Funded my honeymoon (3lakhs)
– Handles all the house expenses
– Save most of the money and invest it for our future only.
– Father will be retiring in max 3-4 years as he is getting old so after that everything’s is going to mine only.I want to advise you to be patient and learn as much as possible. He must be not spending or giving you due to various reasons like saving it for you and your sister.
Support him, build a bond. Sooner or later you’re going to inherit it and then you’ll be glad.-
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CEveryone faces differences in family business. One should look into growing it together with patience. My father built a fortune from 0 sacrificing everything for our future. So, I don’t think having less or no money (with no responsibilities) for 2-3 more years is something I can’t do when I know I’ll be getting a lot after it.
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SIf your father makes a lot then it would be in your best interest to negotiate for a pay or at least your expenses to be covered
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VI earn around 1lakh from my father’s business doing almost nothing. So sad for u OP.
Consider asking ur dad to let u manage the business rather than being a labourer. If they want to pass down the business to u then u should be able to run it and handle customers. Let them understand that. If they dont agree tell them u dont wanna work. Dont consider money now and try to get as much as knowledge of the business as possible.
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SHey bro,
I totally understand how you feel. My situation was similar but a little different. My grandfather had a big chunk of property that he wanted me also to get a share in. My father forged my grandfather’s will (I have proof) and put everything in his name denying me entirely and saying, “Don’t worry I will give you later.”
Then someone put a court case against his inherited property and my father made me do all the running around for 2 years related to the court case related to my grandfather’s property. I did everything – from staying up all night writing legal responses and reading similar court cases to meeting the lawyers etc. it was a harrowing time but I did it thinking I was helping my father. Finally, the will he forged was kept aside and it was declared my grandfather died intestate. But still I have no share as a coparcenery.
As soon as the court case ended, my father showed me his true colours. He not only has no intention of leaving any of my grandfather’s property for me, but he also plans on selling everything, putting it in an FD and hosting liquor parties for his friends every night. When I asked him what about me? He said, “Concentrate on your career and build your own assets.” That’s coming from someone who has illegally forged his father’s will and made me work to get his own butt saved when he was in a court case.
My advice: Don’t be a fool. I don’t know about your relations but in my own life, my own father forged his father’s will and then used me and threw me away when he didn’t need me. Ask for a legal share in the business now itself, they can at least make you a partner. Otherwise, ask for a salary. If they still say no, then leave, bro. It’s better to leave now than to be used and have regrets later. Trust me.
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VBro i can understand, most people in India will be in the similar situation but working for others instead of their own, some may send salary to their home but few will keep with the, but in your case zero salary. In that age we will be filled with passion and dreams.
What i suggest you is I don’t think your father will accept what you say. You have the skills to be independent you can build wood work on your own,but I don’t want you to do it by having a quarrel.
Tell your father what you want to do ask him to give him a year to pursue your passion and say you will come back and take over the business after this.
Try to convince him some how. Take some money, say you want to go on a trip or buy something. If he isn’t giving you anything be frank and say everything is yours and I want to build on my own and ask for the pay last resort or say I will spend the money because anyway it is mine so give me some freedom . Say that you are feeling trapped and want freedom.
You have the skills you learnt in these four years so don’t worry. Take decision my thinking don’t get confused by others opinion.
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