- This topic has 34 replies, 20 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 4 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
-
UTLDR :
I (32M) filed for a divorce in Dec 2024 in Mumbai (Bandra Court) after almost 2 years of mental harassment from my In laws.
Completed 2 rounds of councelling from Mahila takrar committee. Got a call today from police station to come with my passport.Long version:
We were married for 4 years. It was an arranged marriage. They are from outskirts of Mumbai (Ambernath) while I stay in the suburbs (Malad). Wife and her family were always dominating. I pushed back on nonsense demands like international vacation every quarter, suv to be purchased to visit grocery market etc. They always wanted me to shift to their house in Ambernath which I refused. She never wanted to hire a maid for household chores and expected me to do it since her father used to do it at their place. I pleaded with her to hire one since the house was getting dirty but she and her family refused stating security issues and things getting stolen. She has a permanent WFH role while I have a 5 day WFO role. I earn 2x her salary. Things were not rosy, but under control for the initial 2 years.The behavior changed when my daughter was conceived. She immediately went to her home stating I don’t give her enough time and stayed there for 18 months. I that time period I used to visit her twice a month. They used to pester me to shift permanently to their place which I declined again and again.
We had a lot of counselling from family members and she finally moved back in after 18 months. We hired a full time maid to take care of the house chores. She moved out after 2 months stating vaccination reasons and only came back to collect her jewelry. On the advice of my cousin who is currently separated from his wife we hired a videographer to record her act of removing jewelry from the house.
Post this I immediately contacted my cousins lawyer to file for divorce ( packing and taking away all your belonging was a huge red flag for me). Before I could file, she filed for a complaint at Mahila takrar committee and I got a speed post summoning me in a week. I went with my lawyer and after 2 sessions it was deemed failed during which my divorce petition was filed..
I recently got a call from police station informing me that a complain has been filed against me and my mother and I would be required to go there with my passport. The inspector repeatedly tld me not to worry. I asked the for a copy of the complaint to which I was asked to physically come for the copy. I asked them to send the request via speed post so that I can buy some time to think and discuss.
I’m planning to visit my lawyer once the complaint comes via speed post. Any recommendations on possible problems she would have created and solutions to resolve them?
-
-
-
UMay be they know ur on flight risk, and do you have a Misstress? These can be reasons for those sketchy claims .
-
-
ULike to flee the country. From what you have said they haven’t moved officially . If ur planning to do it, know the consequences . IDK think you can avoid it you have to fight it in court ,that you don’t flee the country. Now is the time if ur , u know
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
U498a case, bargain with wife for money, give her what she wants, otherwise you have to spend years in courts n nothing will happen
-
UI am not planning to give her any money under any threat. I’ll prefer to spend it fighting the case for years. Don’t want to create another Atul Subhash case were my money will be used to file cases against me.
-
UI suggest you finish the case early with mutual consent otherwise contested cases go on for 10 years.
-
ULooking at their ego factor, they will not be in a mood to move on. I have prepared myself mentally to fight this for decades if necessary. I am not willing to pay her under any threats since I have faith in the judicial system.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
FYour wife and her family needs to to have a chat with Yamraj, preferably in Yamlok.
Pls be kind and ensure a one way ticket for them and wish them a happy journey
-
-
PSend someone else like your lawyer or anyone who you can count on and collect the copy of your wife’s statement. If FIR is filed, you need to take anticipatory bail ASAP. Cops have asked for your passport so that they can take it into their custody. Your wife/family might have mentioned that you may flee the country. So, don’t go with your passport.
Read more about it here [https://divorcebylaw.com/cruelty-against-husbands-in-india/](https://divorcebylaw.com/cruelty-against-husbands-in-india/)
[https://divorcebylaw.com/cruelty-against-husband/](https://divorcebylaw.com/cruelty-against-husband/)
**Disclaimer:** Without understanding all the facts of the case, the advice given here may not be the best. It is advised to consult an advocate to get better remedy for the issues at hand.
-
UShe could’ve claimed that you abandoned her and your daughter. This might be a reason why they asked for the passport, but regardless of the complaint, they cannot confiscate your belongings. Make sure you go with a lawyer, though.
My other question is, why did you even marry into a family like this? I mean, surely you had a courting period where you get to know their parents, surroundings and their nature etc
-
UI had done a through background check on them. There was no red flags identified. I assumed no news is good news.
-
UHer father used to do household chores while being decently rich (them asking you to move into their house) didn’t appear as a red flag to you?
-
UThis expectation was after marriage. Had I known this before, I would have not married. If a father is not respected in his house, I will not be respected in mine.
-
-
-
-
-
-
IShe could have filed a standard divorce package u/ S85-86 BNS, 316(1-2), the DV Act, and S144 BNSS for maintenance.
The police might be asking for your passport based on her allegations, or they could be trying to create pressure for bribes. Marital disputes are often seen as prime cash cows for corrupt policemen.You need to cooperate with the police, but not at the cost of your rights. Here’s what you can do:
1. Go to the police station or, better yet, send your advocate to understand the extent and scope of the complaints filed against you.
2. Get the police to remove your mother’s name from the complaints unless the wife has adequately proven some wrongdoing.
3. You may need to submit your passport (cooperate for now, as it counts), but make sure to get them to provide written reasons as to why they are asking for it.
4. If needed, file for anticipatory bail to avoid the threat of arrest and relieve some pressure.After-all said and done, it would be cost-effective to settle through mutual consent divorce.
-
-
