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SI am a married 37 year old man. You are free to judge me for sort of cheating on my wife but still I hope someone can give me some sound legal advise.
Story- My relationship with my wife has been in troubled state for the last 5-6 years, but we are living together for our kid. I have never cheated on my wife ever, haven’t been involved with anyone physically.
Due to this personal stress at home and work stress, I started to go out to clubs on every alternate weekends to spend the night listening to music and meeting new people.
There I met a lady, 6-7 years younger than me, she used to sit alone and felt lost. She used to dance with few guys to earn some quick bucks( yes that was the norm in that club).. but she was never too involved in the dance with those guys..
I started talking to her thats the start of her completely false story), she told me that she has 2 kids and her husband is a drunkard who is jobless and beat and torture her.. To feed for her kids she visit this club and depend on the tips for dance or for few hours of company, given by guys like me..We exchanged numbers and started to exchange odd messages during the daytime.. I started going to that club more often even during weekdays to meet her and spend few hours talking to her.. this kept on going for good 4-5 weeks.. I shared a lot of things with her.. Gifted her few things like shoes, watches etc and used to bring gifts for her 2 sons as well.. She used to be accomapnied by her driver to the club as told by her..
One afternoon I got a message from her that the daughter of her driver is seriously ill and need to be hospitalized and if I can help his driver with some money.. Initially I offered her that I can come there and get the baby admitted to any hospital they want but she said the driver will manage hospitalization etc.. So as requested I gave her 25k..
And we kept on meeting in club.. I asked her out for a movie and lunch with kids but she refused saying she doesnt like going out and I respected that and never asked her out again..
After few days, she said her mother in law is not well and she needs 40-50k for her treatment and believing her I gave it to her..
After few days, her driver told me how much stress she is in due to a high interest loan she has taken from someone of 2.5 lacs.. I helped her repaid that..
Few weeks later, she told me that her driver is sellng the cab he drives and she wont be able to come to the club if the driver sell his car as she only trust this driver.. Driver need loan of 1.5 lacs else he will sell his car and I am being a dumbass gave 1.5l to the driver as a loan without any interest..
In between I gifted her few items like a gold chain and an iphone.. and realized I have started developing romantic feeling towards her.. I told her that I love you and she responsed back with a love you too..
Fast forward few weeks later, one of the patron coming in the club knew the reality of this girl and her so called driver.. The driver was actually the husband of this girl and this was a scam played by them on innocent fools like me to first get into an emotinal relationship telling all fabricated stories and then milking the money..
I confronted the girl and she said that driver is not her husband but I did some search on their fake accounts on instagram and found their photos together..(wish I have done this earlier)..
I made her kicked out of the club forever and filed a report at the nearest police post, but policement told me this is a civil case of money related matters and as I have given money by myself they can’t do anything.. they did call the girl to the police chowki and aksed her to return the money but she refused and told me that she will file false 354 and 376 cases against me(luckily I have the recordings of those)..
The drive cum husband ran away from the situation and never met me again..
I have filed a civil case for money recovery of 50% of the amount that I gave her(close to 5 lacs).. I filed that case as a defence against her threats of filing false criminal cases against me..
money is not that important for me.. but the broken trust and trauma of such a scam has left me disturbed.. If I leave them they will do the same with someone else too.. So, I want advise can I file a criminal case of cheating against them and put atleast the husband behind the bar? They keep on blackmailing me with cases and sending out details of this affair to my wife and family.. I am ok to confess this to my wife and apologise.. My intention was never for physical relation with this girl and I felt emotionally attached.. But yeah I did wrong with my wife and I am ready for any punushment that my wife gives me.. everyone deserve a second chance.
But question is how do I teach these scammers a lesson so that they dont repeat this in future and I can get some peace..
Pls feel free to judge my character but please give your valuable advise!
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PThis has to be fake. Also the audacity to call yourself innocent afte paying again and again. Were you born with one brain cell. Not to mention the cheating
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SYeah people do stupid things when in love so I’ll allow you to call me ” born with one brain cell” .. btw I am an engineer and an MBA from a reputed B-school.. but yeah fell into the trap!
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RBhai, Engineer hi aise tharki sutiye hote hain. Also please don’t disclose the name of B-school otherwise its ranking will come down.
Forget the money, take it as a lesson, cheating is not bad if you’re cautious including STDs, scams. Never ever get emotionally attached to someone who doesn’t match your social status.
Also if you want to recover the money pay some to the police and lawyer.
Additionally, as many said, it’s a better idea to give gifts of that much amount to your wife to improve your relationship.
P.S. I am also a B.E. + MBA
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II am sorry but I don’t have any legal advice for you but I have seen many such cases (in fact one such case happened with my own uncle – he never got his money back). If any man is reading this, please never try to help any such damsel in distress kinda woman without doing any proper research and this is coming from a woman myself. Men have an inherent trait to protect people especially women (even stranger women) and SOME women know this and fully exploit this. SOME women often show their vulnerable side to emotionally extort money out of them. Always remember YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR PROBLEMS.
Anyway sorry for the long rant and OP will pray for you since there is nothing else that I can do for you
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SThanks for your kind words !! Relief to see atleast someone can relate to this situation.. people do stupid things in love.. I’ll take this as a life lesson and spend all my energy and time on my kid!
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IThis is not my place to tell but as a child of divorced parents please confess and apologise to your wife and try to work on your marriage(that is if it is still salvageable).
Will pray for you, your kid and for your marriage to work.
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PYou will pray for op who cheated on his wife? Then I will pray for your husband when he cheats on you .
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BI completely understand why you had an affair, speaking from personal experience.
At this point recovery seems a far cry, because this woman is too smart.If money is not an issue then better quit the case. Because in a way you’re fighting a case since you’re still emotionally attached to that woman. Move on, there are better things to do in life.
Repair relationship with your wife if possible or get separated and find a partner (easier said than done). Hope you find happiness!
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SThank you for your response and understanding.. the relationship was never for physical needs..with that amount of money I could have had NSA flings but I have never been invloved in those.. I saw a companion in her who could listen to me for hours and give that emotional support.. I don’t think I will ever involved in a relationship again.. would spend my energy and time on my 6 year old kid!! thanks bud for your message again
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SI have already file a case.. I guess Karma works on points systems..lets see who got more points those scammers or me!!
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ELol if you had spent that money and given that care to your wife, your marriage wouldn’t be in shambles.
I hope your wife gets to know and leaves your ass.
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AOkay so lawyer here
Read the content and to all the readers here as well
There are multiple cases where a woman files a fake rape case or molestation or harassment
Just bcz someone is accusing u, that does not mean that you did that and court also understands that
Now in your case
File a case for cheating go through 318 &318 BNS and proceed accordingly.
File a case against that woman as well and inform the court about it
And if she files any FIR, then proceed to High court to quash the said FIR.You should drag them to court brother
If she comes to settle the case
Take a cheque from her
Signed etc fully filled by her own hand writing
And deposit the chequeI can guarantee you that cheque will bounce and then you can proceed against them in a criminal litigation and yes court will issue warrants against them for non appearance
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HMy bad man, I apologise. I’m sure it must be a very trying time for you and maybe I shouldn’t have had a laugh at your expense. That being said, I just cannot fathom how someone could be so gullible. Unfortunately, it is tough not to see a bit of humour in your conundrum – generally happens when men think with the wrong head.
I’m aware that I’m the last person you’d want to take advice from, but please consider walking away from this situation. Going legal will do nothing but add to your financial burden and stress levels. Consider it a loss and a valuable lesson and move on with your life. The funds you will need to spend on lawyers will be much better utilised on literally anything else.
Once again, I’m sorry for my insensitive comment. I hope you find some solace soon.
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SNo worries buddy.. thanks for your kind words! I’ll put my energy and resources on raising my kid well..thanks
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SHonestly mate. I’m not judging you. You were vulnerable and that vulnerability was exploited. First understand, if you can bear the loss of the money, just take this as a life lesson and be cautious.
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IIts a fools errand trying to teach a lesson to these scammers.Avoid filing a case; it may do more harm than good. Instead, come to terms with the fact that you’ve been conned and move on. U may not get a second chance when your wife comes to know of this.Lost money can be earned back , not honour.
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PShe can’t come from a different car because she trusts her driver only. You believed that? Are you THAT gullible?
If you have proofs, and money *left* you can go for civil case which takes tens of years to come to conclusion otherwise it’s a waste of time. And what you think you can fight the whole case secretly? When your wife finds out you will be up for another shock
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AI’ll give you all unethical life hacks like you have never known before. With a condition you’ll join MRA real SIFF Save Indian Family Foundation.
So here it is, Dude firstly, you did nothing wrong. Don’t let anyone guilty trip you. You’re entitled to get your money back, but you’ll waste more money on lawyers & police. So just try to frame them in a false case.
If you’re wife decides to divorce you, immediately transfer all your assets to your parents, get NOC from siblings that transferred assets belong to you solely & put those assets in a trust & make your mother as trustee & you as a beneficiary.
Then if you’re wife decides to proceed with divorce with legal court case be it family or civil courts. Immediately convert your religion to Islam, you’ll be entitled to marry more than one wife.
Change your name legally & you will save all your assets, you’ll keep your kids & conversion will drag the case for so long for 15-25 years, you’re wife will run out of patience & will be frustrated.
Pro Tip : And also you can move out of the country to any Muslim country like Dubai and further harden your case,as you’re a genuine convert & not a faux fraudulent convert to prove in court. Court demands ONLY evidence, it’ll further solidify evidence in your favour.
And my suggestion, if she divorces you, don’t remarry her, stay single or find another one or rent for the night or hourly basis. It’s much cheaper. Move to Dubai it’s the best thing, you’ll get all flavours from Russian to Filipino to Jamaican to European blondes etc
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AI’ll give you all unethical life hacks like you have never known before. With a condition you’ll join MRA real SIFF Save Indian Family Foundation.
So here it is, Dude firstly, you did nothing wrong. Don’t let anyone guilty trip you. You’re entitled to get your money back, but you’ll waste more money on lawyers & police. So just try to frame them in a false case.
If you’re wife decides to divorce you, immediately transfer all your assets to your parents, get NOC from siblings that transferred assets belong to you solely & put those assets in a trust & make your mother as trustee & you as a beneficiary.
Then if you’re wife decides to proceed with divorce with legal court case be it family or civil courts. Immediately convert your religion to Islam, you’ll be entitled to marry more than one wife.
Change your name legally & you will save all your assets, you’ll keep your kids & conversion will drag the case for so long for 15-25 years, you’re wife will run out of patience & will be frustrated.
Pro Tip : And also you can move out of the country to any Muslim country like Dubai and further harden your case,as you’re a genuine convert & not a faux fraudulent convert to prove in court. Court demands ONLY evidence, it’ll further solidify evidence in your favour.
And my suggestion, if she divorces you, don’t remarry her, stay single or find another one or rent for the night or hourly basis. It’s much cheaper. Move to Dubai it’s the best thing, you’ll get all flavours from Russian to Filipino to Jamaican to European blondes etc
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SBuddy if the relationship isn’t satisfactory try being a bit more philanthropic where it does matter.
A friend of mine in the same boat spends all his resources on orphanages and old age homes. He says the good karma restores everything on his end.
You got what you deserved by being an ideal simp. Can’t blame the grifer for doing what they do.
You learnt a lesson and don’t go trying to avenge yourself. Cut your losses and run 🏃♂️
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AA girl dancing for money and you are expecting emotional support from her. You paid money for her time. She used you to get as much as possible. Now you are saying you want emotional support.
Every sane man knows a relationship based on money that never works. You got a gold digger and she just dug some gold out of you. Because you felt that will bring her to you.
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PYou can file a criminal case of cheating criminal breach of trust. That will ensure that she has to come to the court on every hearing. You can engage a lawyer to represent you and not go personally to the court. Keep on dragging the case on one pretext or the other, that will frustrate her and she may return you some money.
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CYou are at fault bro Giving random gifts and money to stranger without necessary background checks, is a sign of something bad is about to happen.Also you committed Adultery in this process, by cheating with your wife by sharing love messages.It could have been avoided had you stayed loyal and honest.Thr case you should be worried of should be your actual wife divorcing you after knowing this affair
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CThings happen. Just leave it and move forward.
Generally in 1-2 instances of people asking for money you get to know if they are fake, I have been asked by a girl 2-3 times, someone from my college days. Lost just 5k, never gave a penny when asked for larger sum.Like the movie’s, you either con them or move on.. police or law won’t help, hell they can’t help when the case is genuine like you were forced to give money situations. And trying will probably will mess with your family life.
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PShould have invested that money and efforts towards your wife and kid instead. Every problem can be worked out. Confess to your wife since you broke her trust, if she forgives you then try to do everything you can to make her happy and win back her trust. You both go married to solve problems and get out of those together so don’t turn to a third person or an outsider, obviously a stranger only has seen your good sides,not lived 24/7 365 days of the year with you under the same roof. So be a man and fix issues with your wife.
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