- This topic has 82 replies, 71 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 4 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
-
UI’m here for legal advice, apart from the mental turmoil which I’m not looking to discuss here and looking only for advice. My son unfortunately killed himself to suicide due to the problems he had after losing his money to gambling on stocks and indexies and crypto.
Will the parents be bearing his unsecured Personal debt?
ICICI – 10L (14% Interest rate)
HDFC 3.4L (18% Interest Rate)
HDFC – 90k (15%)
HDFC credit card outstanding – 2LTotaling up to around 17 Lakhs.
He was making 46k per month and had a total EMI of 36k. -
-
UWill they try to approach us in different ways/channels to collect the debt? None of the loans had a guarantor.
-
-
-
NI am so sorry for your loss… no child should go before the parent.
Only your son’s estate is responsible for the loans. If he had no assets, the loans will be written off. You have no obligation to pay the loans.
-
UThanks for your condolences. He was living with us. He has no assets besides his desktop computer which he bought with his own money and maybe his AC which I partly helped him pay. Can and will they try to liquidate those ?
-
-
-
UActually no I guess
In contract act
When parent dies liability trf to successor upto the assets received by him
And successor is not liable to pay any extra amount excess of assets received
As ur son is adult(18+)
And he has not shown himself as acting agent of you
Not you have given guarantee
Not he has transferred any asset to youSo I think u might not have to pay unsecured loans
So consult a lawyer regarding this matter
70-80% sure no need to pay loan -
-
SSeeing your post history, looks like you’re the “Son” in question here.
Please seek help, suicide is not going to help you, nor any of your loved ones.
Your mom and dad are going to be better off hearing “I’m in 17 lakhs of debt” from your mouth than “Your son is no more” from a policeman.Kindly contact someone who can help; a suicide hotline, a close friend, sibling, a relative.
Trust me, offing yourself is not going to solve any of your problems. It’s just going to add mental agony to your family, because the collections agents are going to go after them. They don’t care if you’re gone, they just want the money. Please feel free to ping me anytime if you want a person to talk to, bear in mind I’m a faceless stranger on the internet and you’ll fare better talking to someone close to you.
-
-
-
ANo money can buy life again, there is nothing good beyond after life, 17 lakhs is a small figure if you work hard. You will get it back, sell tea roadside, sell padapav, start somewhere build a routine, I don’t know your age but all those years of struggle to reach where you are and you are quitting because of small setback. If somebody is harassing you, you need to talk and build some human connection. It’s a night, it will pass.
-
LMy distant relative got himself into 50L debt from gambling. His father (retired) sold off all properties, took out all retirement savings, and paid off as much as possible. Appealed credit cards companies to waive off interest. The sister also did not object (that her share of property is also getting sold). The relative is just doing his job now. No more credit cards or gambling. Some family dynamics changed, but overall the extended family interacts with him normally.
Life goes on.. with a little less money for the next generation, but goes on.
-
-
UThanks for doing this. OP, there are much better ways of managing the debt. For e.g., take a debt consolidation loan with longer loan tenor so you get a breather and can continue to pay the loan off while you get increments. There are multiple other options, speak to someone who knows money and can help.
-
-
AYour parents would have any day you living than dying due to debt or any reason at all. If you’re earning and saving only 5k of 10k after emi, it’s still better. You have a job. Work on your addiction. Don’t give pain to your parents for a lifetime. They’ll die each day a little.
-
UYes. Alive, you are an asset to your parents. If you are not there, then your parents will suffer so much.
As a parent, I would want my son to come to me with his problems and we can try to solve together. No parent wants to see their son die, whatever the reason. Simply talk to your parents. Even if they can’t help you financially, they will support you emotionally.
-
-
-
-
HSide kaha se aai? I’m just telling that’s it’s very common in indian house holds for sons and father’s to be against each other. Faters you don’t want to give up decision powers to son. sons are 40 year olds with practically no freedom and independence of their own.
-
UBhai. We are trying to tell OP to not take extreme step. Go talk it out with his parents. And you come along saying ki nahi hoga relationship. Arre bhai. Learn to read the situation.
Even if his relationship with his dad isn’t that good, will his dad be ok if he goes and kills himself? Kuchh bhi bolte ho bhai.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
ASUCIDE IS NOT THE ANSWER.
You are thinking about permanent solution to a temporary problem.
So What you are only left with 10K per month..
Since you are in IT in two years you can easily switched and get paid above 10LPA.
I have seen a friend who used to make 15K from intership to getting pay 1.4 L per month in 4yrs.work on your job and try to switch for better pay. YOu can easly pay this amount in less than two year..
DO NOT GIVE PERMANENT PAIN TO YOUR PARENTS
-
-
-
-
PListen OP. let me tell you something as an ex banker, debt is not something to worry about. You can always default on a debt and file for bankruptcy. Start over. It is not something you kill yourself for. its not worth it. It is not your fault that the bank disbursed unsecured loans to you, they got greedy and wanted to make money. More over banks have a provision to write off bad debts it’s not even their money, its the public’s money that they too gamble with. Declare bankruptcy and no bank can do anything about it, i am assuming you don’t have any major assets to your name. If that is the case then the bank can’t do shit. Please don’t take this step.
-
PJust wanted to add that there are settlement agents too that help you get these loans settled for as low as 10% of the total outstanding. Let me know if you want to talk about it or anything else really. Don’t worry man this isn’t as big as your mind is making it out to be. It will pass just don’t fucking off yourself.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
UOp I am the guy who has 26 lakh loan debt and I lost it in my business as I took some overly optimistic decisions in my hypomanic episodes and I don’t have any job and have already missed 6 EMIs …see I am depressed and have morning anxiety thinking of all shit that has happened in the past. But as I am unable to pay EMIs loan recovery agents are coming at my place and I did inform my parents about everything, one thing I was clear was i didn’t want them to pay so i just asked their help to handle the recovery agents, they will try visiting your home and might threaten you and your family but they actually can’t do anything as it was an unsecured loan, as my cibil score is already fucked up i will be only paying it as a settlement later when it’s the right time and settlement can be done with very low amount. Once your file is put in backlog you will not face many calls . Don’t end your life for this thing which even though looks big is small.
People earn people loose when you try to do big chances are high you will loose some money and time… You didn’t commit any crime just be cautious for your future.
-
-
-
CTalk to a lawyer, banks usually restructure loans. It’s 17 lakhs, life is much more important than this.
-
-
UNothing to pay whenever they come asking for money keep 10 photo copy of death certificates
These cc loans are unsecured loans and banks need to be informed upon the same
If they ask that he must be having insurance just simply say they don’t have any info on that
And just with a hand written application and email send and let all the cc banks know that this has happened they will mark it as default and will close it!
I hope you find some peace and rest take care. -
-
EGet rid of EMI, then CC because that will charge higher interest and then from small to big everything else.
You can clear this easily and live happily with your parents who would break completely if anything happened to you.
Personal experience: I cleared a loan of 15L recently, so I can understand how difficult it is but it can be done and life will be great after that.
-
UYou are incredibly young and have a long life ahead of you. Help is always available. Kindly do not resort to extreme measures OP. Your loved ones and parents care for you. Offing yourself is not the solution. Kindly reach out and get help, in five years from now you will look back and be glad that you made it. You can overcome addiction, but your parents will not be able to overcome the loss of their son. Please get the help you need, work on yourself, get a job if you are fired and pay back what you can. There are so many ways people make money these days, you can do delivery through zomato and Swiggy, you can put up tea shops and food stalls so many options, much better options other than suicide.
-
-
TI lost twice the amount. Now, I have earned 4 times what I lost by focusing on my job rather than gambling on stocks. Money can be earned easily!!! If you are the son, improve you skillset related to your job and get higher paying job. Loan can easily be paid off. You can also try to apply for bankruptcy, but not sure the criteria!!!
-
CBud, look into wall street bets or india street bets sub.. every few weeks someone looses big or takes a bet larger than one could afford.
No big deal!! post your trade SS in these subs.. you’ll have some audience.. enjoy the chat with them..Once done, switch off your device and think how to fix this..
17L isnt a big amount to lose a life for..
Its your mental strength that you need to improve!! Tc bud!!
-
-
-
-
-
FIf these are unsecured loans and the person has no assets that will be inherited by the parents then banks are out of luck. However if this person has assets which will be inherited by the parents then banks can come after the parents for loan recovery. So check what’s the value of his deceased person’s assets and if it’s less than 17 lacs, then just don’t inherit anything. Let the banks deal with his estate.
-
UI have a debt of 12L in personal loans and 3.7L in credit cards. My monthly income is 50K, and my EMIs amount to 47K. Being the sole earner in my household, things are challenging, but I’m making progress every day. Hard work is the key.
Suicide is never the answer. I’ve been in that dark phase too, but money should never be a reason to give up. Instead, focus on learning how to manage finances better—it truly helps.
Right now, the debt might seem overwhelming, but as time passes, it will become more manageable. Keep pushing forward, let time do its work, and focus on growth.
-
UThe answer is no. My father had a personal loan due and was being harassed by recovery agents 18 years ago. He died during that stressful ordeal, and when the agents visited again, they were made aware of his demise by the neighbors as we had evicted that house. 3 years later, a policeman came to our house and asked for the Death certificate of my father as a case was filed to recover the loan, but the policeman assured us that the case would be closed after the submission of said certificate. We were never approached by either police or loan agents ever again.
-
UOP please check out the platform Freed – [https://freed.care/](https://freed.care/)
-
IIf you have an unsecured loan and you’re unable to pay, your banks will write it off. Of course there will be some harassment, keep delaying them saying you’ll pay them off. Eventually they will settle for less amount. Don’t kill yourself for godsake. Your life is way more precious than 17L.
The pain for a parent losing a child is way more than the pain you’ll face of a harassment from your banks. If you truly love them, face it. Suicide is never an answer to anything.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
VYou can claim bankruptcy and get your loan amount reduced and interest waived off.
Suicide for 36k emi is just not worth it.
You will kill your parents.
Accept your mistake and end all such activities.
Do not take any drastic step. It may temporary end your misery but till start your parents.
Speak to a CA and get a bankruptcy certificate and then negotiate with the bank.
If you show bankruptcy then your interest gets waived off completely.
-
-
-
UI’ve updated. Part of me wishes I was in the right mindset to listen to those advices people here posted and yours too, but I’m afraid I’m not worthy of living as you all think. What’s fundamentally wrong within me always stays stubborn and doesn’t go, I was in a very similar situation 6 years ago (emotional aspect) and I’m finding myself in much worse now (emotional and financial) and 6 years later it’ll be even worse and the body count of people affected by me will be on the rise and it should stop.
-
HHey OP, take therapy. You definitely need therapy. Give therapy a chance. Be willing to listen and change your ways. It’s ok if you fail again but try again.
Accept your faults & talk to your parents. Try to put needs of ppl around ahead than yours. Come out of that room with no light & filled with smoke. Take fresh sunlight, Take a solo trip for few days and trek if possible.
-
-
-
-
UBro if you are reading this please calm yourself down in the same situation In fact my debt is larger than yours also my family, don’t have anything, tried everything struggling from life from past 3 years similar story lost every bit to Indian stock market future and options don’t know how to file for bankruptcy my parents also know about it my father is a stiff guy never took any one money this single news of mine have made them suffer so much that both my parents have to take medicines on a regular basis to calm them down. I also don’t know when I will get some wrong triggers and do something bad. But till that time I fight, there is not a single day I have not cried for my mistakes but still I am fighting defaulted most of my loans sometimes they even visited my house, biggest issues right now is they have marked my salary account as lien of 2 lakhs credit card dues and my last 2 months salary have gone to vain still reapplying to new jobs and thinking that maybe I can get some hope but fight bro till the time you are here
-
-
-
-
UMental health is more important, focus on that. Don’t pay a dime if you don’t feel like. Spend time with your family, spend money on your family/experiences. Once you are out of funds, declare bankcruptcy.
Literally you can do anything and everything (nothing unlawful) once you are not afraid of losing your most prized possession aka your life.
You gambled away the money no problem, banks/NBFCs too gambled on and lost the money. Not even chinese loan apps would shut with your default. That’s on them and they will still always be profitable.
Don’t even feel guilty. Think it this way, today they wrote off 17 lakhs because of you. In future, you would be paying lot more than 17 lakhs as your cumulative Income Tax, so the money would be returned back for development by you via government.
I too declared bankruptcy once. Today, I am back on my feet and even FIRE’d. The taxes I pay every quarter is 1/10th of the amount for which I declared my bankruptcy. You have created this mess and you will sort it out, just think like this and don’t run away from your mistakes just Learn from them, wish you all the good.
-
TFirstly no, suicide people’s family do not recover or heal. I know cause my dad took that shitty step and offed himself. That was 21 yrs ago and my family is still not over it. So yeah, maybe in 25 years you’re parent might recover. But how about they die in agony and despair?
Nothing kills the soul of a parent than watching their kid die before their time.
I don’t think you’re trying to kill yourself. Your worried you’ll drag your family into poverty with your gambling addiction.
1. Like all addictions it can be overcome, seek professional help.
2. I believe you are from a good education background to be getting 45K / month at 24. So leverage your knowledge. Keep your self busy with work.
3. Give up financial authority. Even for paying 5 rupees you need to get someone else to pay for you (it’s easier than it sounds. I’ve done it before for a while)
Absolve yourself from all financial authority. Let someone else manage it for you. Transfer everything to your parents name so that you can’t sell (in case you own anything)
If you are getting inheritance, make sure of legal binding States you can live and renovate the place, just not sell. Your kids can or your wife can if they choose to in case of your death or dire financial need.
This is all for the future.
At present just give away all access to currency to your parents. Tell them the honest situation you made and tell them they need to strip away all of your authority to make financial transactions.
At least try to kill the addiction before giving up you doing cowardly acts.
At least my father had mental illness and a life time of depression to use as an excuse to kill and run from the fight.
What’s your’s gonna be? Will your parents go around saying
“Oh we raised a coward, he couldn’t even find the balls to try to change himself. Instead he just destroyed our hope of living but because we aren’t cowards ourselves we can’t follow his lead”
Sounds bad? It’ll be 1000% worse. They won’t say it but they’ll think it.
To themselves every day.
So good luck to your parents. I wish they never get a useless turf like you in the next life who will torture them such way.
Prove me wrong OP.. bloody prove me wrong!
-
-
-
-
-
UYou’re strong enough to die man, but it’s pathetic. Face it. Face the loss. Have faith that you’re gonna over come this.
I genuinely believe you’re stronger than that.
And what’s about 47k per month for the rest of years? Won’t you have an increment?
Switch the company and you’ll get the hikeAlso, there will be some amount in your PF, withdraw it and use it wisely till then.
-
