- This topic has 12 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 3 months ago by
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WTldr; wife and me seperated for two years, have a baby girl. The seperation happened because for a number of reasons during her pregnancy. One was that I was not allowed to visit my mother, two was that I give up my whole salary to her. I told her explicitly that I have loans and financially not capable of raising a child at that moment. She assured me she will contribute and once she got pregnant caused a scene that I am not providing for her while I was paying rent and sending her expenses and also was spending what I had for first couple of weeks. She asked for jewels at the moment I had no money so asked her to wait. Involved her father and he also demanded. Irritated I said I won’t buy. Came to my hometown caused a scene in street that I didn’t gave her baby while she was 4 months pregnant. Assaulted me in front of my family. Her mother demanded my mom to write off her house in my name. We didn’t budge. Fast forward few weeks again started fighting and left the house. Blamed me for throwing her out. Fast forward post delivery I asked her to come stay with my family in my hometown. Her father and mother insulted me I insulted them back vacated the house for which I was paying rent(no one occupied it for five months). She lodged police complaint dv 498a and all the good stuff. Dragged my family and uncle’s and cousins. Police told me to get a house. Got a house she fought again. Waited for one month then vacated. Then wanted to fix my marriage visited my wife and infant daughter few days every week since then. Again she told to get a house. When there was perspective house fought with me and blocked me. Threatens me that she will ruin me if I don’t give her what she wants. She says she doesn’t have to live within budget. For asking how much a vaccine costs she blames me of stingy even with my child.. I don’t think this is gonna work out. I believe she is a narcissist just like her mother. Her dad is a wuss. Govt officer, asked police to beat me up. But couldn’t stand up to his wife. What can I do? My only concern Is welfare of my child. But I cant live with my wife if she keeps finding reasons to insult me and blame my reaction for her actions. Her mother as long as she lives she will not let us live peacefully. The complaint is still in police station no fir filled yet as per my knowledge. How can I protect myself and family legally. Asked her about alimony if she doesn’t wants to live with me, again more threats. I have grown numb to this shit. What can I do? Never took dowry. In fact I have bought her 10 soverign of gold. I also bought gold and silver jewellery for my baby girl. already talked with couple of lawyers. One suggested defamation by each family member seperately. Other suggested sending divorce paper but be ready to pay. I got no assets. Still struggling with marriage loans and legal fees. I am happy to provide for my daughter. My wife is of same educational level as mentioned, a govt employee, has also worked on banks and IT. What can I expect in the coming days. There is no reasoning with my wife or her family. I already tried with mediator(whose name is also in complaint for sticking to right person) and lawyer which was in vain.
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SThere are Men’s rights twitter accounts in India, who fight against false 498A cases. Contact them for assistance.
@voiceformenind
@Ambar_SIFF_MRA
@MenTooSave
@DeepikaBhardwaj <— works actively
@SIFF_Official
@SahodarIndia
@ShoneeKapoor
They have [contacts with police](https://x.com/DeepikaBhardwaj/status/1834868478550945960) & honourable [Supreme court judges](https://x.com/shashank_ssj/status/1894455373702013097) & sent many [females to jail for misuse of laws](https://x.com/DeepikaBhardwaj/status/1886718395145707657), which were made to protect them.
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BLawyer here based in Delhi. Since there is an active police complaint for DV and 498A, but no FIR yet, your first priority should be to ensure that it does not escalate into an FIR. You can either try to resolve it through mediation (if there is any scope left) or file for anticipatory bail as a precautionary measure, especially if there is a risk of false allegations being pushed further.
Given the pattern of financial and emotional demands, your legal options depend on whether you want to attempt reconciliation or move forward with divorce. If reconciliation is no longer possible, filing for divorce on grounds of cruelty may be the best course, but you should be prepared for a counterblast with maintenance and additional legal complaints.
Since your wife is educated and employed, she may not have a strong claim for alimony, but she can still demand maintenance for your child. The fact that you have already been providing for your daughter will help your case if maintenance proceedings arise.
Defamation cases, as suggested by one lawyer, are legally difficult to prove and may not be the most effective strategy. If the goal is to protect yourself and your family from further legal harassment, focusing on quashing false cases and structuring a strong divorce petition will be more practical.
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COmg are women the same everywhere? A very similar situation is going on in my house as my own brother was married last. We don’t know how to overcome this. Stay strong op everything will end one day
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Ugood for you but she would have at one point of time hated women like herself too. It just takes one change in belief for a woman to ruin a man.
The guy did not praise her enough while she wasted her body for his child. BAM she becomes the victim and need to ruin the guys life too to make things even. Guy is tired from his job and is not babying her like the guys in her instagram reels, bam… 498 for him.
To her, she is fighting for the make-believe injustice done to her and this fake case is just a way to make things even, maybe in her mind, she is fighting for justice for women at large.
Just takes one change in her value system. Hell… in her mind, she would even be morally right and would hate women like herself if someone told her about herself but with different name.
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DFeel so bad for OP and similar men who are stuck in bad marriages like this. But, not all women are like that. Men only marry after dating a girl for few years atleast. And marry in a relationship where power balance is same. Here, the girl being in a government job and her father being in a government job seems to be the big power imbalance which they seems to be misusing.
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BWho is Gonna tell OP that most likely the child isn’t his I know it will be tough for you to handle but this government jobs people are Worst (excluding the army and people involved in national security) in every way possible never meet any government employee who knows how to behave well with common public they are super egoistic and frustrated, OP try getting paternity test of your daughter it will be costly but worth it
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