Community › Forums › Legal Advice India › Are contested divorce very tough
- This topic has 46 replies, 18 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 2 months ago by
Alphatiger1445.
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AAlphatiger1445
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 10:24 amI have been married for 4 years. My spouse has not slept with me for more than 3.5 years. She doesn’t pay rent or do household chores over that I get legal threatening that there will police and all. She is neither ready to change niether ready for divorce and house is on loan on my name so she ain’t leaving either. Even if my parents visit she disrespects them and provokes them. So I wanted to ask are contested divorces tough. -
DDesiknight9081
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 10:32 amHi. I’m a lawyer here. Contested divorces can be draining, especially in light of the women centric law wherein you will also have to pay her monthly maintenance for as long as the proceedings are pending (especially if she’s non working). Plus they easily last 3-5 years. You might still end up winning if you can prove the grounds on which you’re asking for divorce, but if you’re ready to battle it bravely and bear the lawyer fee as well as the monthly maintenance and then giver her alimony, you should be good. However, best is to do it through mutual consent, if possible. For both, you’ll have to live apart for a year first.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 11:30 amThanks for reply but she isn’t ready for mutual plus she doens’t leave my house that’s the issue.-
DDesiknight9081
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 12:21 pmThat’s a tricky situation and I empathise with you! Hope you’re able to get your way around the situation at the earliest, because I don’t think that you’re ready to leave the house, to meet that pre condition.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 12:55 pmOh ok sorry for misunderstanding didn’t read last line. I will talk with my lawyer if temporary location shifting will help me.
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PPrimetejas7441
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 11:14 amPush her out yourself , stop working , let the house be taken back by the bank , get a medical issue and burn all the money spending .Keep a fund hidden. Make her scramble for money/lifestyle and come to you for mutual divorce .finally give it to her ,take alimony if required-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 11:32 amExactly she also is working. So basically of I take loan from bank and don’t repay the bank will take it back?? Their family is well off.-
IIndiangargi2466
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 2:11 pmYes if you want the house to go away you can do that.But the other things won’t help you. Even if you stop working. Courts will force you to pay maintenance and alimony.
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PPrimetejas7441
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 2:12 pmHouse is banks until the last 1 rs is paid off , if you go jobless and medically unfit , you can almost declare bankrupty . But consult a legal before all thisAnd whatever proceeds out of it ,utilize it
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AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 5:00 pmShe had a past and she is taking it out on me. Yes I tried to adjust in every way possible taking out cooking cleaning medical care paying bills full freedom what’s else do they need. I am actually tired. It’s only one way street nothing comes from theat end
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HHappytiger2160
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 11:35 amDamn it!!I’m saving this comment for ever.
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SSuperhero5250
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 11:18 amShort answer, yes.Long answer, yes very very tough.
Just to give you an idea, contested divorces are so emotionally draining that even many practising lawyers stay away from a family law practice.
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AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 11:33 amAgree but then she isnt ready for divorce she wants to fight that’s the thing. Niether she wants to be in cordial relationship with me -
DDesiknight9081
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 12:58 pmThe reason for most lawyers not wanting to practice family law is also because such matters are mentally draining for them too. And most clients don’t want to pay enough, but also want their lawyer to be their psychologist.-
SSuperhero5250
PARTICIPANT
April 4, 2025 at 5:43 am>but also want their lawyer to be their psychologist.Pretty accurately put.
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SSmartvignesh9184
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 12:37 pmNot tough but yes it takes time-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 12:55 pmThanks for kind words
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SSimranguru453
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 1:09 pmYou know she’s cheating on you as no women in the world will be lonely like that(not sleeping with you) they crave hex more than men. Find out whereabouts of her cheating spree, show proof and get divorce.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 1:36 pmThanks for suggesting
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RRapidfalcon1931
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 1:10 pmtalk to her and her parents that mutually you can pay certain amount but cannot live like this!-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 1:37 pmHer parents are supporting the legal and media threats-
EEpicseeker688
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 3:10 pmFind anyone who can talk to her parents, probably neighbors, or the parents relatives, you need to shove there, your wife is just a puppet, listening to her parents, so go to their house and talk to the neighbors that their daughter is doing this, then societal pressure can help you get the consented divorce.Or get up one day, move out to another town, and let see what happens, at least you will be happy, if I were you, that’s exactly what I will do, she may not leave the house, but you can, she is betting on that you are greedy to lose, once you are ready to lose, they can’t hold you with anything, pack up and leave.
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AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 5:02 pmThanks for this feedback
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AAshishowl687
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 1:38 pmGo to a good lawyer. Start building diary and documentation. Once she is out of home to her native, get injunction for her to stay out. Be ruthless.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 1:41 pmI will try this. Must be ruthless. I have been kind enough
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CCalmdeepika2708
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 1:47 pmWhy don’t you both go for therapy or counselling like relationship counselling……
And it would be good if you record her misbehaviour. You can definitely ask legal help on that basis. Cruelty from any spouse can be considered as the basis for divorce.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 4:58 pmYes I asked for therapy but she declined says it’s not required for her-
CCalmdeepika2708
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 9:18 pmAsk your lawyer about how can you file a case against cruelty and negligence from her side. I have heard daughter in laws who are abusive towards old in laws are subjected to domestic crime.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 10:39 pmSure let me check
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CCalmdeepika2708
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 9:19 pmAlso you can ask to get her mental health checked, if she keeps denying you have the right to file a case.-
CCalmdeepika2708
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 9:21 pmAn aunty I know, tried attempting fake suicide and filed a case against the abusive dil, she was given restraining orders to stay away from them, now she doesn’t live with them.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 10:40 pmOh ok this looks like valid reason then.-
CCalmdeepika2708
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 10:42 pmYes, the dil was proved to be a narcissistic by a psychologist. She was a danger for everyone. -
CCalmdeepika2708
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 10:44 pmIf you remember Tanu weds Manu movie second part, he was send to a psych ward during counselling, because he started shouting …. Idk if such thing is available in india.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 4, 2025 at 2:52 amTo prove mental issues is very tough in India. And my innlaws are advocates so imagine
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LLuckypanda5091
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 2:22 pmontested divorces can be challenging, especially when one partner refuses to cooperate, but they’re not impossible. It might take time, legal effort, and patience, but you don’t have to stay stuck in a situation that’s draining you. Getting the right legal guidance can make all the difference in finding a way forward.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 5:00 pmThanks a lot
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BBrightvaibhav1248
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 3:11 pmBro what I understood from your situation from all the comments is that wife is already trying to emotional attack you and your family. She has sabotaged you from your family and friends I believe l, this is what narcissists behaviour of female does. What she want is to extract money from you smartly as she already know that you have homeloan so she waiting for right opportunity to get rid of you by taking your consent and money. Also keep an eye on her is already in sexual relationship with someone I believe hence she is not interested in you anymore.Point 1 – Be patient
2- Just fuck around secretly it’s better giving all your money due to divorce (paid service or affair)
3. If you have children, start taking them into your confidence by caring them more that how her attention gets towards you if she is not fucking around.
4. Also make your inlaws on your side by taking care and spending time with them and remember don’t talk about divorce with them just give them comfort and make them believe you are the best SIL
5. Also for your wife to not dought you take her out sometime here and there so that she don’t figure out that your having fun with other. And other time just make her that your are not always available to her that’s when her vagina gets wet and then she will makeout with you.Legal
1. You are fucked in all the matter in divorce unless there is bigamy so you have very little chance then loosing it.so just keep her like a accessories in life that’s what our ancestors did with women in general.All the best.
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PPrateekeagle518
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 4:02 pmYour option is to make yourself worthless for 2-3 years . If possible make it as negative as possible.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 5:02 pmYes that’s what I am worried about
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SSuperravindra2858
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 5:32 pmConsult a good top lawyer, makes a lot of difference -
SSuperravindra2858
PARTICIPANT
April 3, 2025 at 5:47 pmWith all the laws in this country, I wonder how the celebrities get fast divorces. Mostly i see them getting within a year of the news of separation of the couple-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 3, 2025 at 10:41 pmYes because they know they will find another. I. Middle-class families it’s matter of prestige so they won’t give divorce and my spouse has personal vendetta against men i believe
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AArpitaninja487
PARTICIPANT
April 4, 2025 at 12:59 amUse the drum system -
AAshishowl687
PARTICIPANT
April 4, 2025 at 5:35 pmJust remember that once a partner brings legal layer, there is no mercy. And be very methodical. This is life’s toughest battle for you. God bless.-
AAlphatiger1445
OP
April 5, 2025 at 8:31 amThanks a lot and I am worried and scared like hell
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PProrider4116
PARTICIPANT
April 5, 2025 at 6:07 amYes, they are tough when the other spouse is difficult to handle. If you feel that your rights of being married are upheld by your wife, you can go for divorce on the grounds of cruelty. [https://divorcebylaw.com/best-contested-divorce-lawyers-in-bangalore/](https://divorcebylaw.com/best-contested-divorce-lawyers-in-bangalore/)There are chances that she may file domestic violence or dowry harassment case against you. It is better that you collect some evidence of her acts through your messages, emails, photographs, videos, etc. Try counselling to understand what is her issue. Even if that doesn’t work, then you think of divorce. Or after counseling if she’s willing to go for a Mutual Consent divorce, it could work for you. [https://divorcebylaw.com/mutual-divorce-lawyer-in-bengaluru/](https://divorcebylaw.com/mutual-divorce-lawyer-in-bengaluru/)
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**Disclaimer:** In the absence of all the facts of the case, the comments given may not be the best solution for your case. One on one consultation with a legal counsel/ advocate is advised to get better guidance.
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