Community › Forums › Legal Advice India › Denied abortion in govt hospital as unmarried women need family as bystander for MTP
- This topic has 40 replies, 29 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 4 months ago by
User_044e7d03.
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UUser_1dc4de0a
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 5:28 amI went to a government hospital in Ernakulam, Kerala for an MTP (Medical Termination of Pregnancy) at 8 weeks. However, the doctors told me that since I am unmarried, I would need a relative as a bystander and that I had to be admitted to the hospital for them to proceed with the abortion.I did not want to involve my family in this personal matter. When I told them I didn’t any close relatives here and brought my friend instead, they refused, saying, “What if your parents later complain to us in case of complications?”
I repeatedly emphasized that under the MTP Act, only the woman’s consent is required for abortion, but they insisted that 8 weeks is a higher-risk stage and referred me to another government hospital instead of proceeding with the procedure.
I want to know—is it legal for them to deny an abortion on the grounds that unmarried women need to be admitted in hospital, require a relative as a bystander, and insist on hospital admission only because of my marital status? If not, is there anything I can do to challenge this kind of treatment?
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UUser_a65f72b1
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 7:51 amDoctor he. You can give consent but a bystander or friend is needed for the process. The process of abortion, especially the surgical one is not that straightforward. Even the medical one can lead to life threatening bleeding in some cases. So if you are alone, its a risk which the doctors don’t want to take. Imagine you are alone and you faint due to the bleeding, then you can end up dead and the doctor will be held responsible. Atleast one person, it can be anyone, your friend or relative needs to be there to support you and watch out for any complications during the period of expulsion and for a few hours post that. Do talk to a trusted friend or relative to accompany you to the hospital. Its for your own safety and doesn’t serve any other purpose. -
UUser_57a45f57
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 8:09 amBaby k!ller -
UUser_23ddc602
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 8:17 amLMAOOOOO ncert bio textbook says upto 12 weeks it’s safe to abort a pregnancy.
(And if it’s wrong, it’s high time they remove it from textbook)This country is filled with educated fools.
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SSakshihawk343
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 9:24 amNot uneducated. Scared bullies who don’t want headache later so saying no. OP why not take a friend and say this is only friend? Or go to cop station and file a non cognizable report ask police to talk to hospital as a favour to follow law
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LLuckypanda2667
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 8:35 amNAL. How is 8 weeks risky… at this stage, it’s just oral medication, not a procedure. The doctor is playing some games to avoid prescribing it.-
UUser_1dc4de0a
OP
February 22, 2025 at 9:40 amAll the 6 doctors I have seen in the process told me it’s a risky procedure and this is how govt hospital works. If I wanna keep arguing we have the entire day or why choose govt hospital.
Eventually the last doctor did tell me they are telling this way because doctors don’t wanna do this as they are taking someone’s life and stuff….-
UUser_3dd6d450
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 12:03 pmWould suggest a private clinic, they are better equipped for these things. Check with a lady gynaec in the city. The reason they say it’s risky at 8 weeks is that if oral methodology does not work, you may have to undergo a DNC which is a small but surgical procedure requiring you to undergo anaesthesia, to ensure that everything inside is cleared out and shouldn’t lead to any complications.As for legal advice, everyone has already explained they can’t refuse. If it’s in you to fight the good fight, you can document everything and file a compliant.
As for the medical explanation, I’m not a doctor but my cousin is and this was her simplified explanation without getting into too many details
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UUser_1dc4de0a
OP
February 22, 2025 at 12:30 pmThank you. I am going to meet someone in a private clinic. What I don’t understand is if the govt hospital policy is to bring relatives ( preferably parents) as bystanders what is the point of saying only my consent is needed in the MTP act. They are indirectly denying me the procedure by saying this is their bystander policy-
UUser_3dd6d450
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 1:40 pmI do understand the frustration and absolutely, when it comes to women’s rights about their own body, the system is far more broken. But this is a fight for another minute, please do take care of yourself. Hydrate well and focus and yourself first!
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UUser_044e7d03
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 3:54 pmI’ve had a similar experience at a govt hospital in Mumbai. It’s better to see a private doctor. You might find resources on which private doctors will be open to do it without judgment in insta.-
UUser_1dc4de0a
OP
February 22, 2025 at 3:55 pmI am going back to Bangalore and plan to do from there. I am looking for some kind of resources to check what are my options there-
UUser_4793833f
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 5:54 pmWhat type of resources are you looking for miss? -
CClevershruti5074
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 8:29 pmDo it wherever you have trusted friends—someone you can count on to be there when you’re in trouble. If you’re a Malayalee, I think a reputed private hospital in Ernakulam would be a better option. Consult a female gynecologist and be open with them.
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UUser_f5491b0f
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 9:34 amHahaha! Police record for an abortion at 6 weeks!!! 😂😂😂😂-
UUser_044e7d03
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 9:39 amYeah sounds absurd, but I was young and it was scary.-
UUser_f5491b0f
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 9:40 amOh poor you! I hope you did get the care and no judgement that you deserved!-
UUser_044e7d03
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 9:44 amEventually yes, but not before a top private doc in Sobo offered to talk to both our parents and get us married right away (???). If I had stayed in that clinic any longer, she might have taken it upon herself to talk to my parents forcefully. It was insane.
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UUser_fb5847af
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 5:46 pmEthics. That’ll be a totally another spiral.Side with the option that favours your time.
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UUser_f5491b0f
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 9:33 amBleghhh…stupid doctors shouldn’t have become doctors if they are going to let their dumbass beliefs get in the way of providing care!
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DDhruvguy48
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 10:16 am[https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/u/0/d/1o2QJKrPjKS92cCj6SX73B8siKlW6TlRNKYe0SC7WrX8/htmlview#](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/u/0/d/1o2QJKrPjKS92cCj6SX73B8siKlW6TlRNKYe0SC7WrX8/htmlview#)A Crowdsourced List of non-judgemental Gynaecologists In India
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UUser_cd9f7056
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 10:42 amI was 6 weeks pregnant. I cannot remember exactly! I was married and I was studying.. I wanted to continue my studies so I went to the gynec and she right away denied and treated me like a criminal. Everyone around me looked at me as if I was a criminal. They later informed my family. Eventually I had a miscarriage and the doctor blamed me as if I did something to get the periods. I just wanted to get graduated!-
UUser_89e45ec2
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 4:23 pmJust studying? Lady you can start a religion already
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UUser_aa4390a6
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 12:24 pm10 weeks. It’s 10 weeks when it’s considered MT by pills might not be effective. But still one doesn’t need a relative at all. Only someone who can take care of you post procedure. Go to a private clinic, where people are professional. -
UUser_141c3aee
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 2:38 pm😂😂😂😂 -
UUser_2e4c9a7e
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 4:08 pmAbortion at 20
U should never ever become a mother🤢 -
UUser_81ca6485
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 4:48 pmI can pretend to be your husband-
UUser_3a561ddf
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 8:16 pm“this guy raped our daughter, life sentence pls” – her parents“thanks bhaiiya, I’ll send you sweets in jail” – her
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UUser_a8c59611
PARTICIPANT
February 22, 2025 at 11:53 pmGet a bystander to come with you. Take your boyfriend or maybe an older female friend to pretend to be your sister or something -
SSubhashshark164
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 3:46 amI thought Indians didn’t give a damn about abortion given the government had to make a law to prevent female foeticide. -
UUser_2861f322
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 5:10 amWhy are u blaming them..just follow the process..grow up..what u doing is a worst thing and in that also u finding sme points ya?? What kind of ppl yar living in society… -
UUser_4ef4021d
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 7:04 amI’ll tell you the real reason. If anything happens to you during the procedure (which is very unlikely but possible) and your family decides to file a case, then the doctor will have to run behind the case for many years even though the law states that only your consent is required. Medicolegal cases take a lifetime.You have to find another hospital and doctor who is willing to do the procedure.
Even if you file a case, doctor/hospital has the right to reject a patient when it’s not an emergency. So you’ll waste the time fighting for it.
If someone is not willing to do a surgery, it’s better to avoid them than force them to do it.
Just let it go and find another doctor.
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UUser_1dc4de0a
OP
February 23, 2025 at 7:09 amI have the privilege to consult a private hospital and get the treatment. But what happens to people who don’t have this option and choose to do this without medical supervision. Eventually that’s what this kind of treatment from government hospitals leads to right.This seemed extremely scary to me they way they were reacting and the attitude to make me leave the hospital. I am not planning to do anything drastic about it, just I just wanted to know if there is something I could do to address what is happening. Atleast for other people who will choose this option later
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UUser_d98b81d1
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 7:19 amYour decision to seek an abortion is undoubtedly a deeply personal one, and while it’s your right to make choices about your body, it’s also worth reflecting on the circumstances that led to this situation. Shame on you not for seeking an abortion, but for potentially failing to take full responsibility for your actions and the consequences that come with them.
Sexual activity, while a natural part of life, carries significant responsibilities—both physical and emotional. If you were not prepared for the possibility of pregnancy, it’s worth asking why you didn’t take more precautions to prevent it. Contraception, open communication with your partner, and understanding the risks are all part of being sexually responsible. Disgraceful if you neglected these steps and now find yourself in a situation where you’re forced to make difficult decisions.-
UUser_1dc4de0a
OP
February 23, 2025 at 7:33 amDid I mention in the thread that I did not use protection? Then why such judgment without knowing the whole situation.Lot of things leading to sex and pregnancy are not very black and white either especially for neuro divergent people. And this sort of treatment from people only puts them in much for difficult situation, possible a dangerous one.
All I meant in this post is to know if there is anything I can do to help other people who will have to face similar issues for multiple reason. I am not planning to take legal action or anything for my sake or what I went through, it’s been clear that that is not an option either. I don’t think anyone deserves to be treated this way. So please don’t make such vile comments without knowing what someone might be going through.
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UUser_aee3cf98
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 7:49 amNo one asked you to preach in a LEGAL ADVICE subreddit.
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UUser_66e6ab88
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 7:24 amWell I have assisted in a lot of MTP’s in a govt hospital when I was in India. The refusal to do MTP most likely does not stem from you being unmarried. Gynae and Obs department are known for the high drama which happens there regularly. People abandoning girl child, accusing staff of exchanging babies, doing caesarean instead of vaginal delivery etc etc. A lot of families and relatives become violent and nobody is wants drama in their life as most of the doctors and nurses are students themselves. They want someone to accompany you so that if your parents/relatives later holds the hospital responsible if something happens to you or if it is an ectopic pregnancy and you need surgical intervention then do need a next of kin present there. Doctor patient confidentiality means nothing to the relatives and parents and the nobody wants to answer or get beaten up if your MTP becomes known. -
CCleverfalcon1643
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 7:46 amTry another doctor no! Maybe a private clinic!-
UUser_1dc4de0a
OP
February 23, 2025 at 7:53 amThat’s what I am doing, from the government staff attitude they wanted me out of there on my own and they succeeded in it.All I meant is what happens to people who can’t avail private treatment, what happens to them
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CCleverbro9225
PARTICIPANT
February 23, 2025 at 8:50 amNAL but a doctor:Medical advice: you need to act fast. 8 weeks pregnancy is still early and not complicated. Abortion pills are effective. Beyond that, there is a chance they might fail and you’d need surgical abortion. Please go to an obgyn now.
Legal advice: you’re an adult. You don’t need parental consent. After you are done with the abortion, contact your state medical council and gather as much evidence as possible. Not only did the doctor refuse to provide you a treatment, he also misled you by saying it is a complicated pregnancy.
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UUser_f5491b0f
PARTICIPANT
February 24, 2025 at 9:40 amGod! Gynec care is so stupid…and apparently all around the world!!!! I wanted my mother in there with me when going through a routine checkup and here they are forcing this woman to get family involved for a pill! 🙄
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