Community › Forums › Legal Advice India › Divorce has to happen but elder people getting tensed and nervous on how it will turn out to be. Is dragging going to ruin us?
- This topic has 17 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 3 months ago by
User_9e01679a.
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UUser_a3e214e9
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 2:28 amMy sibling’s life is destroyed. He got married into a really wrong family. The girl was a gold digger who made him spend lakhs on her and her friends. She and her family have been consistently lying to us, abused us, insulted and threatened us on more than one occasion post marriage.
All this while living in her own home.Some of her demands and things she and her family has done till now-
Bought an iPhone on loan and forced my brother and mom to pay for its installments
Forced them to pay for her rent in Bangalore as well
Forced my brother to book 5 star hotels and restaurants for her on every occasion
Forced my brother to buy the most expensive gifts for her AND HER FRIENDS and my idiot brother did everything
Never went to see my family who live 10 minutes away. Not even when my father had his 3rd stroke. He recently passed away suddenly. Not a single person from their family came or even called
Said she doesn’t like Indian so a western toilet bathroom was constructed for her. Almost 60k.
Called us classless and said we don’t know how to live
Silently took away all the gold gifted to her and the exoensive gifts to her to her home. The almirah is empty now. There’s literally none of her stuff
Her brother Threatened to SA our little brother to his face in front of all elders. When objected, abused my bhaiya.
Always was interested in my husband and how is he and forced my brother to talk to him and send proofs.
Mocked my brother’s financial condition and the struggles he has gone through in his life
Made the first DV claim on my brother when he requested her to not go outside in her underwear size shorts at 12 pm in the night and she went CRAZY. Called her father and said he hits me.
Accused that we keep her like a gareeb naukrani. Mind you, she faked an accident for one year and escaped to her home. Forced my brother to pay for all medical costs.
Sharply denied my brother to enter her rented flat in Bangalore saying men can’t enter. He has seen photos of boys in that flat on IG, partying, poker, drinking and what not. All deleted now ofc.Her and her family have mentally and emotionally tortured our family to such a great extent I don’t have words.
Nobody at this point knows even 1% about her and her family now.
When objected, has always said you are the husband it’s your duty. To take care of me.It is just a case of extremely extremely poor decision making on the part of elders who absolutely have no idea how shitty AMs have gone now. My questions now-
1. It will be one year of no contact/no living with spouse in this March. Should we file for divorce asap? Problem is elders are now saying kuch mahine shant raho. Wo log abhi shant hai warna wo log bhi case thok denge. (let’s be quiet. They are quiet as well. What if we do something and they file cases at us in return?) That they are going to do ANYWAY. Is waiting for more months a good decision? What if they file a case during that time? They have been accusing us of DV and Dowry for quite some time.
2. The witch is from a police family and her retired father has contacts with goons and what not. Moreover, the claims of dowry and dv. All fake. How to tackle these false claims? Do we file cases on them in return as they mentally tortured my brother and my mom a lot.
3. We don’t have much proofs because by the time my family realised they are not good people, there wasn’t much evidence to collect. Will our case be considered in the court seriously?TLDR- overall want to know if waiting to just file for divorce is the right thing to do? It may take years and who knows what will happen. Want my brother to be freed of that horrible family asap.
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UUser_59915063
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 2:42 amNAL.Begin recording each and everything of what happens now. Install CCTVs if needed. Filing divorce would be good but with evidence is even better. Be ready for fake cases from her but do tell your brother and your entire family not to talk with her and not to involve in any fights as she will record it to show how your family is abusing her, give her no evidence. That way even if she files fake cases she wonβt have any evidence. Be ready for few years of court battle but that will save your brotherβs life.
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UUser_a3e214e9
OP
February 28, 2025 at 6:00 amYes we installed cctvs. And we are trying to gather all proofs now.Thing is, we never recorded the phone calls back then because my brother had no idea.
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HHarishguy315
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 3:14 amHonestly, waiting wonβt change anythingβif they want to file false cases, they will do it anyway. Better to take control and file for divorce first rather than stay stuck in fear.Even if you donβt have solid proof, courts do consider circumstantial evidence and witness testimonies.
Your brotherβs financial records (showing forced payments) can be useful.
Her lack of cohabitation and history of accusations (without medical/legal proof) weakens her case.
Get a good lawyer ASAP, document whatever proof you have (bank records, chats, anything), and be prepared for their accusations. If her family tries to intimidate you, donβt hesitate to file counter-cases. The longer this drags on, the worse it will be for your brotherβs mental health.
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UUser_a3e214e9
OP
February 28, 2025 at 5:48 amThank you for your advice.
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RRutujahawk838
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 3:26 amSee I know I am a lawyer but I know the reality here….. Nothing will happen you just need to finish this matter by the illegal means if you can dominate them all your money will be recovered and if not dominated more money will go -
SSilentseeker4914
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 3:38 amTry mediation first, see if things get better.-
UUser_a3e214e9
OP
February 28, 2025 at 5:58 amWe tried.
For 2 years we have tried.
Our papa suffered from many health problems rendering him unable to communicate properly.So my mom and brother used to reach out.
The girls father was a low grade badtameez, insulted my family on numerous occasions.
Every time we reached out, they threw accusations at us. They somehow got hold of my buas home and called there and insulted my papa.
They have spread everywhere that our family beats the daughter.
They refuse to accept their mistakes, wrongdoings. Just keep on repeating the same stuff- Dowry and DV.
Also It’s just impossible to find out what the girls intentions are.
In the last interaction, her whole family literally abused and threatened us. So after that, there’s no going back
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SSilentseeker4914
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 6:16 amDo mediation through a lawyer.
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UUrbannadia6400
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 4:24 amNAL.
Its important that the rest of the family legally separates from the brother.
Please consult a lawyer, in my understanding there is some what to do this in order to better insulate yourself and the rest of the family from malicious financial and legal moves from your brother’s spouse. -
VVivekguru848
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 4:28 amPrepare elders mentally for bumpy ride for next several years! -
UUser_9e01679a
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 4:42 amShouldnβt you be more upset at your brother for not standing up for himself and giving her money over and over again ?-
UUser_a3e214e9
OP
February 28, 2025 at 5:29 amHow is this going to solve anything? Be upset at him?ΒAnd Please don’t think I never objected. He used to think that let me adjust here. Let me adjust here also. He is afraid of confrontation. Then also she made such claims.Β
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UUser_9e01679a
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 5:32 amIβm saying all this drama was because your brother was scared of simply saying no to his wife lol.Even now, why are you getting involved?
Let your brother grow a spine and say no more to his wife and file for divorce. He chose to marry her. He chose to give her all his money. So let him be the one to finally take control of his life.
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UUser_a3e214e9
OP
February 28, 2025 at 5:40 amNot going to entertain you anymore. If ranting is all you are gonna do.-
UUser_9e01679a
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 5:41 amOkay. Keep refusing to let your brother take control of his life and initiate a divorce.
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HHappyguru6095
PARTICIPANT
February 28, 2025 at 6:14 amApproach a lawyer and take all legal steps. Be courageous and face your fears head on.People back off when they sense courage.
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UUser_a3e214e9
OP
February 28, 2025 at 6:21 amYes. Need courage here.
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