- This topic has 17 replies, 15 voices, and was last updated 1 month, 2 weeks ago by
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U21m here, a guy in his 40s comes in our house for some construction related work (government quarter ha toh usme Jo har saal ka hota hai) that’s how we met him. Basically woh thekedar hai, then fir humne usko apne private house ka kaam bhhi karwane ke liye rakhlia like kuch kaam hota ha construction related private me toh woh dekh leta ha, obviously paise leta ha
Jab bhi kuch hota ha toh mummy hi private ghar ka kaam dekhti ha, like mummy and dadi (phle dadaji dekhte the now he ain’t alive)
So the thing is dadi bhi old ha toh woh ab ja nahi paati ki waha khade hoke sara kaam karwaye, dadi fir mummy ko akele hi bhej deti ha,
My father has been suffering from severe schizophrenia since he was 18 or something. I live in a joint family (dadi, chacha chachi, me, dad, mom) my family is not that educated types like thoda desi family maanlo, my mom is just 10th pass (housewife)
I think my mom is having an affair with that thekedar. She already changed the password of her phone so I don’t check (but she don’t know that I can still using fingerprint) jo unki WhatsApp chats hoti ha woh bhi clear rehti ha like chat top per toh hogi lekin ander se empty hogi, mom clearing them
I tried notification history option but it’s showing “deleting chats 100%” basically not working
Jab bhi mummy Ghar se bahar jati ha toh usse phone per call karti ha, call history me dekha maine sab kuch
Ab ma kya karu samaj ni Ara,
Ma soch raha hu 15 days analyze karta hu fir bua and dadi ko batadunga ki aisa aisa ha
Ya fir mummy se khud puchhu??
Also, how do I recover those whatsapp chats? Like they both are chatting and she is deleting the whole chat instantly.
Already installed Odialer
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UDadi ko bataa do. Agar baat zyaada aage nikal gayi toh phir badi problems hogi. Agar abhi hi control ho gaya toh aage legal hassles mein faltu paisa nahi kharche honge. Court and cases is hard on mental health for everyone. Family will be lot more disturbed. Jinni jaldi bataa doge saaf saaf, utna hi yeh internally resolve ho jaayega.
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SGive her a break. Your father has been a schizophrenic probably since their marriage and on top this is s joint family. Who do you think can give her the mental support? If she has any friends etc. ignore it and keep it a secret (if there is anything).
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FYou know that divorce is an option right..??
She can easily get divorce if she was mentally exhausted by the condition of her husband.
I don’t know why people support infidelity as if it is a moral thing to do.
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INeither of spouse can be master of other ie bodily autonomy is given. Only issue is laws are biased so men lose a lot when caught.
Also you are to focus on your life and build it on your morals rather than enforcing them on your parents or spying on them.
But yes beware if your mom starts treating you or your siblings badly and you find anything dangerous or life threatening for you or your father.
Also since your father is mentally unstable , not sure telling him will be good or bad cuz he might escalate it to another level.
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UEven if you expose this information to your family members, the only remedy for your father would be to file for divorce.
But given the fact that he’s mentally not fit at the moment, he cannot file a case or even give testimony.
You must consider the overall picture of the family. Is your mother failing on her duties towards the family? Is she planning to divorce your dad and go with the other man? You need to have an honest conversation with your mother first. Once you involve other family members, it’ll just become a shit show and name calling session.
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UYou probably have a PC or a laptop. Link her WhatsApp to your desktop and keep a check. There is maybe a system of call recording as well which when on automatically records all the calls. I don’t know how that works though. You could use that as well maybe.
Adultery is no longer a crime unfortunately so their isn’t much you can do. Your father is not fit so divorce will be even more problematic for him. And it could be terrible for all of you. You yourself may end up in jail if she starts filing cases. Just find out if she is doing that. If yes then best you can do is start cutting ties with her. You would be independent soon in a couple of years I guess. Just stop talking to her and ignore her completely if you are really against her behaviour and is pisses you off. That itself is enough of a punishment for a mother, assuming she is a real mother which a lot of woman aren’t nowadays.
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UIf I use whatsapp web, then if I read that man chats then there will be blue tick so will be suspicious that someone is already reading our chats , i already installed Odialer and she got suspicious, she started asking me why it’s recording automatically and stuffs, she got panicked coz she know she is doing wrong stuffs
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UHow about changing the settings so that the blue tick never shows. There is something like that. Then it only goes upto double tick. Also, you need to catch something only once. Again, you can’t take any legal action. Just start cutting ties with her if you don’t like it. That’s the most you can do. Also, did you get anything from Odialer?
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UThere is nothing about it that anyone can give a Legal advice. What u are facing is a moral issue and morality is often subjective. Even if u are right, she must be having her justification for doing it to fill some void. No matter how wrong it sounds to u, but she must be happy so let her be. There is nothing u will gain by spying on her. Focus on ur life and career
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