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SI (35M) lost a divorce case after fighting for years. The court has ordered me to pay 2 crore as alimony to my ex-wife (34F), plus 2.5L per month in child support for our 5-year-old son. We were married for 8 years and I make around 10Lpm and with NW of 7 crore while my ex wife makes 3Lpm (she’s financially independent but still tortured me for alimony).
She asked to settle for 3cr which court denied and drop down it to 2cr but then she dragged the case for years to mentally exhaust me. The court still sided with her. I don’t want child custody, but I do want to make sure the payments are reasonable and not excessive.
She already earns well and 2cr is unreasonably excessive so any legal loopholes or negotiation tactics I can use at this stage? Or Would delaying payment strategically (through appeals or negotiations) help?
This whole process has been mentally exhausting, and I feel like I’ve been cornered into an unfair settlement. Should I fight and take it to upper courts?
Any advice would be really helpful. Thanks.
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FYou cheated your wife of 8 years. You gave your child a broken family. And now you don’t even want to contest for your child’s custody. So you basically just look out for yourself. And going by the details you sound pretty selfish. Even if your wife earns well and can take care of the child herself, you ought to take some responsibility and probably she knows you well enough to know how much these figures are going to rile you up. And since you earn pretty well for yourself the court did right. Pay up. I just hate it when the child suffers because the adults can’t keep it in their pants!
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RWhat entitlement man. You emotionally harass someone, ruin their mental health, scar them emotionally, change the trajectory of their life for your own selfish reasons and now you want equality?
You have a child you want no responsibility of, a child you willingly chose to create, with a woman you vowed to be loyal to, so yeah, I think you need to bear the brunt of it in the way she sees fit. I wish she did get the 3cr.
What she earns does not exonerate you from compensating to her for the “inconvenience” you CHOSE to cause. You won’t be able to turn back time and take any of it back so bear the financial burden of it, at least.
She got the unfair settlement here.
If this was an AITA post, you know I’d say YES!
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CPeople like you make others suffer, innocent men also get trapped because of strict laws which men like you deserve.
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AYou mentioned your net worth only. What about hers? How were the expenses or investments shared by both of you when you guys were together?
Just stating her current salary and making it feel like alimony is not needed is utter BS.
What i she took care of all expenses of the house and you took take of investments. In this case she will have less to no savings.
You have cheated and you don’t want your son, and now thinking the deal is unfair. Entire thing looks like a business deal for you. What a crappy person you are.
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RIn the entire story I don’t see any care or concern from your end about the child’s welfare . Especially after adultery from your end which the child will have to eventually get to know and then handle the trauma . Plus court has given custody to mother which means she will take care of child while you are expected to pay for your child that you procreated. This is a genuine alimony case where the court has ordered things so that the lifestyle of child is maintained , the child goes to a good school, maybe would need therapy , would suffer from common health issues like any child from time to time. Your wife is now a mother with a child maybe past her prime and will face more hardships. Things seem fairly handled to me.
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MMen are money making machine your value is that you either beg borrow steal earn to provide for your family this is your work as set by society and judicial system.
You cant do anything to the judgement either go to higher court but since your are earning lot I don’t think that will also help.
I suggest you pay and move on and don’t marry and as of child might be a possibility that you can ask for shared expenses ie she brings bill and you split bills (not sure).
But pushing it will only be more exhaustion for your self & don’t marry, next you have good salary I suggest now you either go for adoption or enjoy single life save your money like crazy and when retire enjoy your life like crazy.
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IMy sanity is restored after reading comments on this post. Internet is full of grown men trying to say everything is conspired against them. While there are definitely legit cases of judges overarching and other spouses weaponizing the whole process, this does not sound like one. You say the wife’s side proved it all in court. You don’t mention the current cost of childcare etc… This sounds like venting.
It happens sometimes. I have seen close friends going through this phase. Stay strong OP.
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ZWhatever happened has happened. I don’t know the dynamics around you or your wife’s relationship. People do grow apart as they age and it is okay to leave a toxic relationship anyway. Adultery is not good nor is asking for crores in alimony. If I was you I would pay up and move on. Also, include visitation right in settlement so you don’t end up paying for a son who grows up hating on you. If you meet him or not that is your choice but Atleast have that door open. Don’t be too hard on yourself and try to think from your wife’s point of view as well. If you do end up in another relationship please be open and honest. It is better to leave the relationship than cheating.
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PThe amount for child support seems reasonable, mate. You make 10L per month and your wife makes only 3L PM. Why should you not pay 2.5L for the maintenance of your son when your wife will have to do all the work of raising the child without the father. I don’t see many grounds for getting the amount reduced in appeal.
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