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AI am posting on Reddit for the first time ever out of sheer anxiety since I do not know what to do. My parents have been married for almost 30 years, and we have always lived with my paternal grandparents except for 4 years when he got transferred (they came to visit). My grandmother and father have known to be unstable and abusive (verbally, emotionally- overall his entire family is), but my mother has never mentioned about it to anyone thinking about the society. Upon the paternal grandparents’ deaths, nobody really talks or stays in touch with my father since they nobody likes him. Now we’re a family (muslim) of 4 – me, mom, teenager sister and him.
Few days back he started acting up again and was full fledged abusing my mother and saying how she and I are going to die just like my maternal grandparents and my uncle who died of cancer recently, and mocking on extremely sensitive issues. It was disgusting. Yet we were quiet since we were sitting for Iftar (breaking our fast) and we know that he can become mental sometimes. But then he kicked my mother’s chair while she was sitting on it and pushed it into the table which hurt her hands, and I simply couldn’t take it anymore. I took charge and fought back and it got somewhat physical from both ends and I threatened to call the cops. My mother forced me not to and it is since then he has started threatening to leave my mother and kick all of us out.
The issue is I am working but on a contract and for specific reasons I cannot negotiate a decent salary with my company for atleast 2 years, and my mother is not financially independent, leaving us is a completely locked situation. My sister is too young. The situation is extremely tense. If this becomes a legal issue, what can I do to protect me, my mother and my sister and what are my rights as per the law (Islamic or otherwise, however it goes in court idk)?
note – time and again my father and I have always fought because of his extremely abusive behaviour, so this isn’t the first time. But it got more violent than usual -
BLawyer here, based in Delhi.
Based on what you have described, the law is on your side and there are ways to protect yourself, your mother, and your sister. The abuse, threats, and violence fall under what is recognised as domestic violence, and you all have legal rights regardless of religion. The Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act applies to your situation and allows you to seek protection from your father’s abusive behaviour. It also allows your mother and you to continue living in the shared household, even if the house is in your father’s name or is inherited. He cannot legally throw you out or force you to leave. If he tries to, or if there is any further violence or threat, you can go to the police and file a complaint. You also have the option of approaching the court to seek a protection order, which would legally restrain him from behaving violently or evicting you. It is also possible to ask for other reliefs, including financial support, through court.
If your mother is unwilling to go to the police directly, a complaint can also be made to the local Protection Officer under the Domestic Violence Act. There are helplines and legal aid services in every state that assist women in such situations. Even though personal law (in your case, Islamic law) governs some aspects of family matters, Indian courts protect women and children from domestic violence through secular laws, and those laws will be applied in court for your protection.
Please preserve any evidence of abusive behaviour, including recordings, messages, or videos if you are ever able to collect them safely.
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AHi, thanks a lot for this information. Ive been feeling extremely anxious for the past couple of days now. He also has complaints against him in our local police station regarding certain other issues. That helps us further right?
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BYes, that definitely helps. If there are already complaints against him at the local police station, that background can strengthen your case when you seek legal protection. However, the remedy we are talking about under the Domestic Violence Act is civil in nature. It does not involve criminal punishment unless there is a violation of a court order. The purpose is to ensure your safety, protect your right to stay in the shared household, and provide financial and emotional security through enforceable court directions.
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P1. whenever there is a physical abuse, go to the hospital (not a small clinic, a big hospital with a proper Emergency unit) and get the treatment done. Tell them the reason how she (your mom) got hurt. They are ought to file Medico Legal Case (MLC), which will be intimated to the police. Initially police may just call your father and advice or they may not do that as well. But this could be used later to file Domestic Violence case. Also repeated cases on your father may instigate the police to take action.
2. If your mother is being abused verbally, physically, emotionally, financially she can file Domestic Violence case in 2 different ways. The details can be seen her [https://divorcebylaw.com/domestic-violence-lawyer-in-bangalore-india/](https://divorcebylaw.com/domestic-violence-lawyer-in-bangalore-india/)
3. If he does the same thing to you, you can also file the DV case against your father.
4. If he threatens to throw you all out of the house, your mother can seek right to shelter through DV case
5. Your mother and your minor sister can ask for maintenance through DV case.
For further clarification consult us [https://g.co/kgs/hJLgYGh](https://g.co/kgs/hJLgYGh)
**Disclaimer:** In the absence of all the facts of the case, the comments given may not be the best solution for your case. One on one consultation with a legal counsel/ advocate is advised to get better guidance.
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AThanks a ton! My mother is not willing to go ahead with anything just yet, but I just needed an overview of what can be done further since this has a high chance of escalating further. The situation is pretty tense rn.
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