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LMy uncle, who lives in Haryana, has been married for 8 years now. It was a love marriage and an intercaste one — my aunt is from the SC category (not to discriminate, just for context) and she has a govt. job. She stayed with my uncle and his parents for hardly a year after marriage, then moved back to her parents’ house due to some tradition of staying apart for a year (though I’m not sure how much of that is true).
It’s been 8 years now, and she’s still living with her parents. About 5–6 years ago, she lived with my uncle again for around 6 months when he was away from his family in Mumbai. They have a daughter who lives with her mother. Since my aunt got pregnant quite late, they faced some medical complications. She changed the doctor at the last moment, which led to their daughter (my cousin) being born prematurely. Now, their daughter is around 7–8 years old and still has trouble walking properly.
My uncle suggested that they move to Kerala or somewhere with better medical facilities for their daughter’s condition, but my aunt refused. She said she would manage it herself but hasn’t really done much. She also doesn’t seem to take her daughter seriously. She gets angry at her over minor issues and sometimes even beats her.
My uncle’s parents have been very lenient with my aunt from the beginning, but she was never satisfied. Even though my uncle’s mother managed all the household work while my aunt was working, she was still unhappy. At one point, my uncle and his parents suggested that they could move out and live separately if that would help, but my aunt didn’t agree. Interestingly, she manages both household chores and her office work at her parents’ home but still insists on living there. Even her own mother has told her to live with her husband, but she refuses.
My uncle once suggested a divorce, but my aunt threatened that she would not give him one and might file false charges of domestic violence or dowry harassment if he tried to leave. Over the last 2–3 years, my uncle meets his daughter only occasionally and manages the expenses whenever they meet. However, he lost his job about a year ago, and now he feels uncomfortable meeting his daughter because he used to take her to malls and buy her expensive things, which he can’t afford anymore.
He’s been extremely stressed since losing his job and has had suicidal thoughts. He feels stuck in the marriage and doesn’t know what to do.
TL;DR: My uncle and his wife have been married for 8 years but have lived separately for 7. His wife refuses to live together or give him a divorce and has threatened false complaints if he tries to leave. He’s unemployed, depressed, and suicidal. What should be done in this situation?
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PYour uncle needs some counselling or meditation sessions to focus on himself. He needs to find a job before he thinks of divorce or child custody. Let him focus on himself first and then other things.
Once he has a job he can ask for child custody or visitation rights. [https://divorcebylaw.com/child-custody/](https://divorcebylaw.com/child-custody/)
Go through the divorce procedure, if you are interested to know [https://divorcebylaw.com/mutual-divorce-lawyer-in-bengaluru/](https://divorcebylaw.com/mutual-divorce-lawyer-in-bengaluru/)
[https://divorcebylaw.com/best-contested-divorce-lawyers-in-bangalore/](https://divorcebylaw.com/best-contested-divorce-lawyers-in-bangalore/)
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**Disclaimer:** In the absence of all the facts of the case, the comments given may not be the best solution for your case. One on one consultation with a legal counsel/ advocate is advised to get better guidance.
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