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EHold up. She is a US citizen and is coming back to India permanently? Does that mean she will give up her US citizenship?
Do not come to this shore before the divorce is done. Get a lawyer to represent you in your “PERMANENT” absence. Not saying something contrary will happen to you but its better to be safe than sorry.
If she is a US citizen the chances of she getting married to someone in India and moving back to US is more probable. So you be aware of that. If this is the case then you are/will be in a power position.
We have seen enough here to be this skeptical of the intensions. Do not go – What is wrong with these people. People have literally committed suicide because of the divorce law craziness.
EDepends on how grounded your POSH committee is and frankly your contribution on job wise matter tooEPosh doesn’t/wont act on a single comment. Screenshot all your chats incase she deletes the chats. Tell them it was a insitu tongue and cheek comment and as far as you are concerned there is nothing more or less to it. You are amazed that this has gone to Posh committee.Ask them what you need to do to rectify the situation because You didn’t think this could be comprehended this way.
Your tone is the key here. So work on your tone before you are called up.
EYour thought is still unidirectional for now. Not saying it twill not change with time and a few grey hairs. For “MOST” Parents the single largest worry is their kids happiness. The parents don’t know the culture and frankly the girl “For Now”. For them this is an attack to their lifestyle and culture and will take their kids away from them. So their first reaction is to defend and hence all this manipulation of disowning and the rest. I’m asking him to diffuse the situation first.You have not learned to detach and think to be able to give proper advice to anyone. You have become the part of the problem thinking the parents are really going to do it. How many parents do you know or have even heard that have disowned their kids who have lived with them for 24 years.
I’ve gone though this personally and I pray that you do not. Things went quite bad because of my “Knee jerk reaction” before my fathers friend explained it to me what I’ve exactly told you now. We are all young once. Took me 6 years of threats/fighting/manipulation before they agreed. They are all bumchums now. Yash Chopra Happy ending if you will.
EThe Internet has created a generation of people which doesn’t care about how they talk because of the lack of consequences for it.EIt is a cultures responsibility and duty to take care of the elders.
You will be an elder one day.
This disown, suicide and things are all drama. You are better educated probably has already seen more of the world then them. You can not have the same reaction like theirs.I was in your situation and I could have done any number of things but didn’t and the situation keeps running in my mind everyday. It has run on repeat for the last 16 years and probably will run this whole lifetime. So be careful because you are still young and things have a funny way of coming back.
Jindagi balidan maangti hai chote. Balidan kabhi temporary kabhi permanent hota hai.
I’m also not asking you to hurt the girl and her family.
Dhaga bandh lo haath me ki shaadi nahi karenge bolke aur karenge to isise karenge.
Remember kabhi jaan dene ki baat mar karna unke saamne.
Parents are different beings they will never allow you to be alone. You know even your wife won’t be able to love you as much as they do. Even in her 7 life times(You can take this in writing from me).
Bagawat karne se mana nahi kar raha hoon lekin bagawat me aassu aur khoon ka behna jaroori nahi hai.
EWhat kind of college are you studying in. You should name and shame.You understand that this will be a case of he said she said right? Unless you have some kind of proof.
Get a letter from your parents and say you can do it because of religious beliefs.
E24M so you are probably already working. Get out of town and say you are going to Bengaluru if you have a job in Chennai. Change everything after that. Emails/phone/Banks etc.It will need confessing to your parents for this to work. Your parents have to play along for telling her+her relatives “if it comes to that” that you are in Chennai.
Regards,
A Bhuktbhogi
