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PYour father will never feel helpless – he is probably wiser than most. Pls spesk to him. He probably has seen 10x worse than what youte experiencing. Also share with others in your caste and ask them how they handle it.
I can easily say that it gets better once you enter corporate or move to the city but literally no one can advise you better than someone who is from your caste who has walked in your shoes.
Postpone changing surname by 3-5 years, you can change it to kumar / your fathers first name like south indians do. You literally cannot tell whos what caste in south india because of this.
PDoes your last name clearly give away your caste ? For eg some castes are Sc/St status in one state but OBC in another.Changing your last name has huge consequences – your mark and graduation certificates, passport etc.
Yes your dad already knows what you are facing. He has seen it all. Discuss your pain with him and listen to his advice – most likely he will advice you to forget these ppl.
Use the sc/st act liberally when such casteist folks insult you. That will show them.
PHow old is your BIL ?
What happens if you can’t do it or “forget” about it ?
So many second wives totally disregard the care and upkeep of their minor step kids. I mean you could do the same,Do the absolute bare minimum, like cooking for example, and if asked you can simply say “look I’m doing whatever I can” and leave the room. Make it such that they need to think twice before asking you, after all they need you not to the other way around.
Slowly this also you can transition out of, just say you got very busy with your kid etc.
PIt’s just a smarter way. Do you think other more well to do ppl are not disturbed ? Do you think they lack courage to fight the mosque ? Did they lack connections ? Why do the rich and super rich not dirty their hands with court fights & activism ? Why is it always the guy who has nothing fighting the battle ? Cos he has relatively nothing to lose. Others have young kids, reputation, business, property and other such things that they worry about before getting into a fight.
